Theory of Attracting Women

2008-07-25T07:37:00.000-07:00

***QUESTION***

whatsup dr dave,

let me start out by saying you are my savior. I've
been getting your newsletters for about a month
now, and WOW! thank you. my question is: i work
in a restaurant. needless to say there are quite a
few 8s,9s and even a few 10s working there.
approaching and talking to them is not a problem.
but i feel i should be careful when asking one of
them to join me for beer after work. i don't want
to bring any feelings of uncomfortableness between
us (if shes not interested). what would you
recommend i do and what should i say?

t indy

>>>MY COMMENTS:

The first thing to remember is that when you
"ask a woman out," you IMMEDIATELY start a whole
chain of mental and emotional events for a woman.

She has to decide if she "likes you" and if
there could ever be anything between the two of
you... and if she's thirsty and interested in free
beer.

You get my drift.

Women know when you're asking them "out out,"
as in you're asking them because you have a
"romantic interest."

Guess what?

When you do this, it ALSO puts the woman in the
driver's seat in the situation because she
instantly realizes that she has something you
want. Have you ever heard of "wanting it tax?"
It's when the price goes up the more you want it.

Now, as you probably know, I don't generally
think that it's such a great idea to date women
you WORK with, because you never know what's going
to happen, and the last thing you need is losing
your job or having to work for hours at a time in
an uncomfortable situation.

And besides, attractive women usually have
attractive FRIENDS, and if you're cool, the women
you work with can lead to an endless supply of
dates. Think it over.

You might want to think of it as a goose that
lays golden eggs.

Even though I don't advise dating women you
work with, I still want to address your basic
question of asking a woman out without creating
discomfort...

Remember, most guys do the exact same things.
They start talking to a woman, then say, "Hey, can
I take you out sometime?" or "Do you have a
boyfriend?"

This stuff is HORRIBLE.

It does exactly the wrong thing. It makes you
look like a wuss boy that needs a girlfriend. And
if she's not interested (which she probably won't
be), then it WILL create some discomfort in the
future.

MUCH BETTER TO TEST FIRST, THEN TAKE A SMALL
STEP.

If it's a woman you know, tease her, bust on
her, and generally act like you don't care. Make a
comment about her and walk away. Be Cocky & Funny
when you're with her, and don't be boring.

Then, if she's responding positively (laughing,
hitting you, telling you that you're a pain,
etc.), then say, "Hey, do you have email?"

If she does, have her write it down, then say,
"Bye".

From a MAN'S perspective this might not seem
any different than just asking a woman out.

But, from the WOMAN'S perspective it's VERY
different.

First of all, you've never shown her any
romantic interest, which doesn't give up your
power in the situation, and hand it all to her.

Secondly, instead of putting "dating" pressure
on her, you've only asked her for her email
address (and maybe her number as well).

But you HAVEN'T asked her on a date, you
HAVEN'T created any kinds of weird vibes in the
air, and you HAVE made her wonder what you have in
mind.

It's powerful, think about it.

***QUESTION FROM A WOMAN***

Hey There,

Ok So I am a butch lesbian who has recently
subscribed to your mailbag. Ok I am totally
fascinated by you and what u have to say. I am
planning on getting your book next week actually.
I have used your tips about getting the phone
numbers by asking the girl if they have email. Ok
that works like a charm, i haven't yet not got a
phone number. So Just to let you know, you advice
works for butch lesbians too! ok but here is my
prob. I met this girl and i got her email addy,
phone number and s/n. Well I didn't want to be
like everyone else and call her so i sent her an
instant message. Well finally she wanted to call
me. My response was I hope your not a stalker,
trying to be funny and cute. Well she called and
we talked forever, i couldn't get the girl off the
phone. Now she calls me like 5 times a day. She
really likes me, she has admitted it and she broke
up with her g/f so she could see where things go
with me. I like her a lot and i want to see where
things go, but her ex is a threat to me and her ex
might want her back. I've also made the mistake of
telling her i like her, so I'm thinking she may
become "in control." My question is what do I do
next? Meaning how do i get that control back, do i
continue acting like i want her, or should i talk
about other girls? Also what about the ex? do i
make it a threat or what. Also she is jealous b/c
her best friend also likes me. Anyways, any advice
u may have for me, i would appreciate it.

Much Appreciation CNS Georgia

>>>MY COMMENTS:

This is great.

You know, if I PAID people to write this stuff
it couldn't possibly be this good.

I have this secret lesbian fan base that only
breaks the silence occasionally when the situation
gets really critical. Love it.

OK, here are a couple of thoughts:

1) If she has an ex who's in the picture, keep
your distance and make her pursue you.

I have PERSONALLY made the mistake of acting
CLINGY when an ex turns up in the picture and
tries to get a woman back.

It's generally not a good idea.

The best thing you can do is what you're
already doing... tease her and let her pursue YOU.

If she's busy pursuing you, she'll be thinking
about you, wondering what you're doing, wondering
why you're so busy, etc., and won't have the
attention for the ex.

On the other hand, if you start pursuing HER,
then she'll have to "decide between which one she
wants."

Not a good position to put yourself in. And
it's MUCH less interesting for her as well.

2) If her friend also likes you, that can be a
GOOD thing.

Jealousy is a very interesting emotion.

It's not something you want to use to
manipulate another person, but if the situation
creates it naturally, that's another thing
entirely.

If you have someone who is interested in you,
and that person knows that others are also
interested, it only makes them like you more.

...You know, someday I'm going to have to do a
Double Your Dating LESBIAN SUMMIT, so I can be
stuck in some resort somewhere with 100 lesbian
women who need dating advice.

I would have to say something male and
insensitive like that, wouldn't I?

***QUESTION***

David,

I've been reading your weekly newsletters, and I
decided to take the plunge and get your online
book.

It's got some great information, and some tips
that I haven't thought of. I found myself already
doing a lot of things covered, and I guess I'm
pretty pleased that I needed much less training
than I thought I did.

But I do have this question, and it's not covered
in your books, and it continues to stump me. I've
added a bit of extraneous information, so you have
a good picture of what happens.

A quick note of background, I was raised by my
mother, and like many men like that, I can be
pretty effeminate. Frankly, most of the time, that
isn't a problem as I have found, more often than
not, as long as you're confident, girls will just
go on; if anything, it confuses the hell out of
them, because it's very easy for me to play the
friend role in the coffee shop, while also
flirting with them. In fact, it's very disarming
(and it allows me a greater understanding of girls
than most guys have, and has helped me quite a
lot.)

Usually (but not always) girls I meet are off the
internet, and what happens every single time is
this: I meet them and then within three to five
hours they're in my bed, or we're in my car making
out. Some of this is due to confidence, some
because of the cocky/funny thing, some of this is
because I am disarming and I make them feel
relaxed. I don't have sex with them, I'm a virgin,
it's just a personal choice, and I will add that
all the girls I've ever been with except for one
were *not* virgins, and in two or three occasions,
I've had to refuse a hard sex sell.

So after we're done making out, I take them home,
everything seems fine.

Then the next day, they don't want anything to do
with me. They do want to be friends (most of the
time) but they don't really even want to talk to
me on the phone or see me in person again. They
definitely don't want to date again.

Sometimes I get a reason why (only once or twice
has that reason been "we're moving too fast" or
its variant "I'm really confused and I don't know
what to do.") One time I got the response that I'm
"too different" another time, in a situation which
happened with a girl who lived out of state, and
therefore I really wasn't trying to date, I later
found out that I made her "feel dirty." The
answers are all different, and yet they (usually)
seem to have a universal confusion that binds
them.

And for the most part, I'm hard wired for a long
term relationship, so this is all depressing to me
that I'm essentially having lots of little one
night stands. I've theorized that it may be
because I'm moving too fast, but is that concept
real? Is it because I lead them on so much and
then I finally refuse them?

Your book is entirely about seducing them, and I'm
successful doing that; but for some reason, we
part, they go back and think about things for a
bit, and I can't do it a second time because they
want very little to do with me. (It happens
quickly too...I've woken up to emails saying "I'm
sorry to tell you this...but...")

Anyway, your thoughts are appreciated,

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Wow, yeah... I really feel your pain.

You've learned how to make women want to make
out with you and have sex within a few hours of
meeting... BUT YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED IN SEX... and
then they don't call you back.

Will someone please give this guy a medal for
dumbest question of all time?

I think you might want to go read some "Mars
and Venus" books or something. Try buying women
things, or maybe paying for lots of dinners or
something.

lol... I think you're going to figure it all
out.

***QUESTION***

Hey Dave,

First off, I want to tell you how amazing your
stuff is! (I'm sure you already know) It's really
changed my life. I feel great about myself! I
never realized how much of a wuss I was until
after reading your book. lol...I laugh at how
stupid I was. I am now able to talk to women and
feel completely confident about myself. It's
great!

Anyways, I was on a double date the other night
and I decided to try some of your techniques. I
noticed that just by acting like you are in
control of yourself, gets you far. I had my date
feeling as though she wasn't good enough for me,
and my friends date was even hitting on me. I
could not believe it. However, I had trouble
coming up with some C&F things to say. How do you
know what to say and when to say it? I want to
master this! What do you suggest to further this
skill?

A, UT

>>>MY COMMENTS:

OK, let me see if I understand your situation.

You read my book, realized you were a wuss,
STOPPED being a wuss, STARTED getting great
results, and now you want to know what I suggest
to further your skills?

Sit down and take an hour of your life to WRITE
DOWN the 10 most common situations you find
yourself in with women, then come up with 3 great
Cocky & Funny lines for each situation.

Finally, practice them in your mind, and in the
real world until they feel natural.

PRACTICE.

***QUESTION***

Hello Dave, This is T., I just ordered and
received your CD's and I'm ready to roll, I just
want to let you know my current situation, not
once have i dated someone who I was really
attracted to, clicked with, and who was
emotionally stable, I'm 27 years old and all my
friends are dating descent looking women and
moving on in their relationships, They tried
setting me up with a few people, but they were all
nasty looking, and they tell me that I'm very
picky and that i should learn to "like someone for
who they are" which i think is pure bullsh**, to
me, attraction is very important or else i can't
date the person, I know I'm a good-looking guy and
I can do just as good and better once I gain the
tools from your CD's, I have a problem with being
"nice," instead of cocky, ball-busting, and
mysterious, like all my other friends, the few
girls that I've dated that i found attractive
always stopped calling me and I simply don't know
why, i simply don't have the positive qualities
that the "jerk" has, i simply don't know how to
approach someone who's attractive and carry on a
good conversation, will the cd's turn all that
around for me? hope this email isn't too long, if
it is, I'll keep it shorter next time.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

The short answer is: YES. DEFINITELY.

By the way, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING SAYING:

"...hope this email isn't too long, if it is, I'll
keep it shorter next time..."

That's WUSSY TALK.

Are you with me?

Next time you write me, and you think your
email might be a little too long just say, "If
this email is too long for you to include in your
newsletter, let me know and I'll edit it."

Don't say things like, "hope this email isn't
too long."

Subtle things communicate so much.

EVICT THE INNER WUSSY!

***QUESTION***

David, I have used your C&F stuff with amazing
success, but theres one area of difficulty I have
encountered. I'm a freshman in college and I talk
to A LOT of girls. Almost all of the girls I've
talked to are very nice and seem very interested
and love the C&F attitude. I get their AOL
Instant Messenger names and their e-mails and all
but the problem is that some of them, even though
they had a fun time talking with me and they spent
a lot of time with me initially, they block me and
ignore me and I don't understand why. I've asked
ALL of them why but they don't respond to me and
they look at me weird and shyly. But I say and do
the same thing with them as I do with others who
don't block me and who just completely love me. I
just don't get it. I thought that maybe I
intimidated them or something. Help me David Help
Meee!!!

-c

(btw your stuff is incredible...I have 10x the
confidence and ability to get dates with women
than I ever had in the past, thanks man!)

>>>MY COMMENTS:

lol... calm down. You're making me nervous.

You sound like you need to chill out and relax.

If you're getting BLOCKED on instant messenger,
then you're probably being just a TAD too pushy
with these women.

Lean back.

Tease.

Make a comment online then say, "I have to
run"...

Don't act like you want her attention.

RELAX.

And did I mention that you need to RELAX?

Did you hear the story about the old bull and
the young bull standing on the hill?

The young bull says, "Hey, let's RUN down there
and have sex with one of them cows!"

Old bull looks at him and says, "Let's WALK
down there and have sex with ALL of them."

Ponder. Reflect. Repeat.

***QUESTION***

Let me preface this by saying that I agree 100%
with your ideas. I realized the cocky and funny
principles in high school, when I noticed a good
friend got laid constantly because he just
naturally had that routine down. He always laughed
about it - the less he appeared to care about
getting laid, the more he got laid. Pure magic.

But I'm just curious if there are women who are
actually turned off by the cocky and funny
routine. I've always liked smart, nerdy girls -
the librarian archetype - and I'm a little leery
that these women might not be so impressed with
the C&F. Nobody likes a wuss, of course, but I'm
wondering about the women who aren't so easily
manipulated. How about some failure stories? When
doesn't this stuff work so well, and are there
things to watch for to keep from going too far
with it?

>>>MY COMMENTS:

First of all, Cocky & Funny isn't a super-
secret, covert manipulation tactic. It's a way of
flirting, teasing, and interacting with women in a
way that they enjoy.

Secondly, I've found that the only women who
DON'T respond well to it are women who are
UPTIGHT, women who aren't at all interested, or
overly SHY women who are intimidated (in which
case you can usually just tone it down and have
fun with them, too).

That's my personal experience.

Smart, nerdy girls like the ones you're
attracted to (I'm glad you have that market
cornered, by the way) should LOVE to spar with you
and will probably LOVE your Cocky & Funny
attitude. Keep it intellectual.

There will ALWAYS be situations in life when
things don't work for you.

Tiger Woods screws up a lot of shots, and he's
the best in the world at golf.

Michael Jordan misses a lot of shots, and he's
the best in the world at BBall.

We don't live in an ideal testing lab, we live
in reality.

Don't worry about what won't work, and find
what will.

The thing to watch for to keep from going too
far with Cocky & Funny is a woman getting VISIBLY
ANGRY or asking you to leave. If that happens,
walk away.

***COMMENT***

Hey Dave

Here comes a big thank you. Your material is
unbelievable/ amazing/
your fave thesaurus here>. Just wanted to clue you
in on what you've done for me and how you've
healed the social leper (at least with girls) that
was me.

Bit of background: I'm short, stocky, average
looks but I can be funny. The "funny nice guy" got
me places, but trouble was, I was a major wimp
when it came to women. The Sub-Standard "Mom's
brainwashing" owns up at this point. I'd stumbled
my way through school and early twenties, slowly
but surely improving my appearance and myself from
no-hoper to "in-with-a-chance -if-he'd-only-open-
his-mouth" type guy. Last Christmas I got lucky
with a girl I'd dreamed about at work. And when I
say I got lucky, I mean she seemed to fancy me
too. Well in early October this year, after losing
her completely to the Mystery that is Women's
Attraction, I was at the end of my tether. I'd go
home after parties seriously annoyed that I got
nowhere, ragging on at myself for missing my
chances. I was losing my will to live,
metaphorically at least.

Anyway, did a search on the net, found your stuff,
and downloaded your ebook the same day. Read it,
and immediately realized what I'd done wrong with
that girl. Mentally, committed myself to give up
on the memory of her and moved on. That evening,
went out to a club with friends and applied your
principles (well what I could remember anyway) and
did SO well I was a new man. UNTIL I got a little
too drunk and turned WIMP again and spilled out
how I thought this girl there (a friend) was
amazing etc. She literally hid from me the rest of
the night. hahaha.

So fast forward to now: The Wussbag side of me has
been consigned to a berth on S.S. Titanic, and I
have had 6's and 7's throwing themselves at me
these last couple of months. I'm moving up the
food chain slowly but surely. Cheers for sorting
my head/life/etc. out and helping me towards being
able to look myself in the eye in the mirror
again.

Some wise person once said "If you wanna get
loaded quick, start a religion". Well Dave, looks
like you've inadvertently done that.

Cheers

MJ London

>>>MY COMMENTS:

What, no gifts for me?

Yeah, you gotta be careful with that alcohol
stuff.

It can loosen you up, but it can just as easily
make you act like a dumb ass in the worst way.

Great job, and thanks for the email.

Isn't it great that we regular guys can have
success with women...? Love it.

***SUCCESS STORY***

Ok, for everyone reading this now.. GET DAVID D's
BOOK NOW!! and his CD/DVD's too!! Dave, you are
the man! I've never in my entire life had this
much success in the last 6-8 months. Case-in-point
I met this girl, about 8.5, and when we first met
I was a young jedi.. lol I had only just bought
your book and was a novice. So I became Cap'n
Wussy..lol And she said she just wanted to be
friends, so I moved on like you say. Well we have
been friends ever since, we occasionally hang out
and I would push the C+F attitude to the hilt. The
would love it, she called me an ass, smartass,
etc. Well she calls me here reverently to tell me
she now has feelings for me, and she doesn't
understand why.. of course you and I know
why..hehehe.. Supposedly it happened when we went
to a movie together, I was basically treating her
like my bratty little sister. Now she wants me and
says she can't stop thinking about me, she called
me a bastard cause she can't stop thinking about
me.. Damn, man you teach some powerful stuff.. I
told her some stuff about other women, not that
I'm dating but who have came on to me and she got
jealous, I wasn't trying to make her jealous.
Dude, I'm attracting her and I swear I'm not even
trying!! I just wanna date around and have fun,
hell I'm in a band and have dreams of being a rock
star so I'm not planning on settling down soon..
Anyway, you are truly a Jedi Master!!...

-bassman in oh

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, the good news is that even if you don't
hit it big and BECOME a rock star, you can still
ATTRACT WOMEN like a rock star!

Nice. Good work.

And I really like the new word "supposedly."

***QUESTION***

Dave;

I've never wrote into one of these before, but
after reading some of your stuff and putting it to
the test I wanted to commend you on your C & F
technique... Good Stuff!

Since I'm on winter break right now I've only got
a chance to try it out online. It's been going
great and I've been getting good responses, but I
can't figure out how to close the deal. I know
you said that you want to get the woman on the
phone as soon as possible, but all I've been
getting is a couple e-mails a day from this one
that I'm trying to bag. She is a definite 9.5-10
and without a doubt interested in me, I just can't
get her to close the deal and contact me on the
phone or give me her number. What should I do?

>>>MY COMMENTS:

"BAG"?

"CLOSE THE DEAL"?

I'd first recommend that you stop thinking
about "bagging" and "closing the deal" and start
thinking about how you can make her feel
ATTRACTION.

If a woman feels ATTRACTION for you, then the
"bagging" will take care of itself. Are you with
me here?

Also, STOP FOCUSING TOO MUCH ENERGY ON ONE
WOMAN.

If you're just dating women right now, NEVER
put too much importance on one woman... ESPECIALLY
one that you've never even talked to.

Meet other women.

Go out.

And get your mind of off "closing" and
"bagging."

That's needy, user talk.

***QUESTION***

Hi I have a 2" of beard and I wanted to ask would
your e-book help a guy with beard in the same way
as any other guy, even though I keep it well
groomed. Thanks

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yes, gentle reader, this is a real question
from a real person.

My answer:

No. This stuff will absolutely not work for
you.

I'd recommend that you trim the beard to one
and seven-eighths inches, and keep it slightly
less well-groomed.

That should do the trick, and all of my
concepts will then work for you.

***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***

Hey Dave,

Gotta tell you first of all that I'm a girl and
accidentally was subscribed to your newsletter by
a well meaning 'friend'. I found it interesting
reading about how guys are so hung up on
attracting women, going on dates and stuff. Do
forgive me I have not read your ebook Double your
dating stuff, no offence, it's just that I'm
married with kids and dating other men (apart from
my husband) is not something I'd be thrilled
about.

Anyway, I just wanted to comment on some stuff I
read in your newsletter. Here's your first hand
girlie response. It is NOT true that "once you're
in a "NO" category it's hard to get out no matter
how good your game is. Personally there were a few
guys that I've assigned to a NO category at first
and ended up dating later, my husband being one of
them. Most of my girl friends would tell you the
same. And it doesn't matter what kind of
characteristic would send a guy into the NO
category - too young, too old, too skinny, too
short, too poor, big nose, big ears, too boring,
too depressing, etc etc etc you name it. None of
it matters, at least it never mattered for me, no
matter how much I tried to make myself think
rationally. It all depends on how manly you are.
And different women have different ideas on that,
if you match most of those or at least some, it
doesn't matter if she put you in the No category
at first. Women change their mind often, as you
probably have noticed. While writing this email to
you I've changed my mind at least 3 times as to
whether I should send it or not. LOL. One last
thing - having a lot of women in your life is not
a very noble purpose for a man's life. Being a
better person and a better man is, and if you
manage to make it a priority in your life, then
beautiful, intelligent and lovable women will be
all over you in an instant. At least I find it
true in my life and in the life of my friends all
over the world. R VL

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Again, I couldn't have paid someone to write
something better.

NOTICE TO ALL MEN:

If you want to attract a WIFE AND KIDS, and you
want a woman who changes her mind three times
before even FINISHING an email, then take the
above advice.

My favorite:

"Having a lot of women in your life is not a very
noble purpose for a man's life."

Yeah, you're right.

Having a lot of women in your life SUCKS when
you're a man.

Thanks for your email.

***QUESTION***

My first every try of your wisdom. I got a phone
call with a girl ringing about my car. My mate saw
who she was and began chatting her up. Then i got
on the phone and gave it a speal, and told her to
contact me for a test drive and I would show her
the ropes.

The next day i got a phone call from her again.
she never liked the car but asked me if i used the
phone number to help pick-up! I put it back onto
her and told her that she called me and was
picking me up. she never denied it. two days later
i rang her and told her i was coming her way and
would like to partake in her favorite meal and
coffee. was Thursday or Friday best. Sure enough i
got the date. my first ever time I've asked a girl
out, and she ended up being a 5'10" leggy blonde
who did modeling and was studying law! CATCH!

Thanks for the confidence boost C - Australia

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, the language barrier might exist, but
the communication is LOUD AND CLEAR.

Nice work.

***QUESTION***

Dave, I have your ebook and your Advance Audio CDs
and my success with women has dramatically
increased. I used to get nervous around attractive
women and would act like a complete wuss. Now I am
able to remain confident and in control, and
sometimes I notice women blush or act nervous when
I talk to them.

My problem comes when I am having a conversation
with a woman. It seems like I am only able to talk
about relatively boring things like, "how's school
going?", "what did you do last weekend?", etc.. It
is hard for me to incorporate the C&F attitude
when I am not in that fun, easy going state of
mind. I can never think of anything that I could
bust her balls on. If I am in the right setting
and atmosphere, like at a party, it is easier for
me to pull off the C&F attitude all night. I do
notice that once I make a comment that gets a
woman to laugh, it's all good from that moment on.
What kind of C&F comments can I make when first
meeting a woman to get into the flow of things?
Should I focus on her physical attributes or
something else when making that first C&F comment?

Thanks MP Louisville, KY

>>>MY COMMENTS:

The FIRST thing you need to do is LISTEN TO THE
CD PROGRAM AGAIN.

It's more important that you just RELAX and get
rid of your INSECURITIES than ANYTHING ELSE!

Cocky & Funny is important, but it's MORE
important that you practice the body language and
voice tone exercises in that program, and you
learn how to project the types of beliefs and self
image that attracts women.

Don't worry as much about the techniques.

The body language and attitude are FAR more
important for you at this stage.

***QUESTION***

Hi Dave, I have to say I'm the biggest wussie
you'll ever meet! I mean I can even get the nerves
to order your seminar, which I truly want to
order.

I just got out of a 13yr. marriage a year ago and
I really want to get back out into the dating
world and have fun like the rest of the guys. The
problem is that I can't break out of this wussie
shell that I'm in. I Don't know how to give myself
courage to approach women without my subconscious
mind wussing out.I've read all of your dating
tips, and they sound great, but I'm still in
confusion on starting a conversation with a women
and keeping it alive. I have to admit that I'm one
of those quiet guys that don't say to much unless
I know a women likes me, then I can talk my ass
off, then after all said and done I still wussed
out on asking her for a phone number, or a date. I
desperately need your help to get me back in the
dating world, and if you can't help me then I
don't think anybody can. Do you have any advice to
get me out of this wussie stage so I can get back
out into the dating world, and to purchase your
dating seminar? Do you have any seminars coming to
Minnesota?

thanx K.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Please follow these instructions:

1) Find a strong, buff friend.

2) Ask him to BITCH SLAP you.

Repeat until you can stop acting like a girl.

I would recommend that you invest in my
Advanced Series, but I don't want to confuse and
upset you.

***QUESTION***

Dave,

You are the man!!! I have been receiving your
newsletters for about 4 months now, and plan to
get your book as soon as I get some legal issues
taken care of. I gotta say that your stuff works
wonders. Here is my example; I was at the
laundromat earlier today, and I just happened to
run across a girl I went to High School with. I
have changed a lot since the, and she didn't
recognize me. I couldn't resist the temptation
.....this was a girl who blow me off back then. I
walked up to her and started talking. Nothing
much, busting on her for coming in with her mom
..... "You still living with Mommy I see." Stuff
like that. So, after a few minutes, I tell her I
have to go finish up my clothes. I walk away
without saying a word. While I'm standing there
folding my clothes, I glance up a few times and
watch her looking at me. Every time I look up, I
give her this sly little half-cocked grin and she
jerks her head away. I finish up and go to leave,
giving her only that little grin as I'm going, and
walk out to my car. Right before I start the car,
she's running out with a slip of paper in her
hand. Its her number. Like I said before, this was
a girl who wouldn't even look my way 4 years ago.

Okay now.....here's my question.....Normally I
couldn't approach a girl like I did this one. I
get up to them, say hi, then I freeze......once I
can get into the c&f routine its no
problem......but a lot of times, I find it hard to
get into it.......Got any pointers for me?

FC Kentucky

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Oh, I LOVE THIS STORY!

Don't you wish you could turn back the hands of
time and have another chance with all those hot
girls that ran around your high school... the ones
that wouldn't even look at you?

I'm pretending that I'm you right now, and it's
great.

To answer your question, don't worry too much
about being Cocky & Funny when you first meet a
girl that you've never talked to... one that
you've just approached.

The only thing you need to focus on is getting
her info so you can follow up later.

Use the 3 minute email/number technique, and
don't worry about being Cocky & Funny until you
get together with her next.

Trying to come up with cute lines when you
first meet a girl usually makes you self-
conscious. Just get her info!

***QUESTION***

Hi Dave,

I recently ordered your CD series and I have to
tell you that it was totally amazing. I am calling
it amazing due to the lack of words that can
describe/praise the series. I have had your book
for about a year now. When I got the book, it was
a big eye opener and I felt like taking the book
and hitting myself over the head with it {I used
to be a big WUSS}. I thought nothing could be
better than that but you proved me wrong by
releasing the CD series which is absolutely
untouchable!

I have read your book many times and have heard
the CD series about five times. EVERYTIME I hear
it again I hear something that I failed to
hear/note/realize before. I have decided not to
listen to any other tape, CD or radio till I have
this stuff so ded in my subconscious mind
that it becomes second nature. For this I would
also like to make a suggestion to all of the other
readers. There is a saying: "IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO
LEARN YOU MUST BECOME". I have realized many times
that I act and behave normal when I am around
friends Or women that I am not interested in. BUT
as soon as a hottie comes around, I try to switch
to the personality and character that you have
taught most of the times I succeed BUT there are
many times when it is hard to so SUDDENLY change.
IF YOU STAY IN THAT CHARACTER ALL THE TIME, YOU
DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SWITCHING GEARS. OVER
THE PERIOD OF TIME IT WILL BECOME YOUR REAL
CHARACTER AND SECOND NATURE IT WILL ALSO GET YOU
MORE RESPECT FROM FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

I also realized that BODY LANGUAGE is 93 or
better percentage of the communication. BUT have
not seen you RECOMMEND A BOOK ON BODY LANGUAGE. I
went to the library and Borders and found a lot of
books in fact, too many! Can you suggest a couple
on Body language? Thanks in advance. Thanks! PG
Ohio

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Thanks for your email.

I love it when I hear from guys who are taking
action, and getting this part of their lives
together!

Unfortunately, I haven't been able to find ANY
books about body language that I consider to be
GREAT.

And worse, most of the books I've read about on
body language teach you NOTHING useful about
ATTRACTION.

You might check out some books on body language
at that bookstore... But unless you understand
all the things you've learned from my Advanced
Series, it won't all make very much sense.

2008-07-18T07:34:00.000-07:00

***DATING QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hey David D!

Who says there's no such thing as magic? When it
comes to women, cocky+funny is PURE 100% magic. It
is one of the major keys to getting her making her
comfortable with you, to getting her number, to
getting the date, kissing, getting laid,
EVERYTHING! Your stuff is pure platinum my man!
Looking back on mailbags from over a year ago, I
still shake my head and say: "Man, this guy is
good. I cant wait 'till I am able to pull off
those lines like that!" The lines are so funny and
with cockiness, it just blows them away! Every
time
you do it, you can just FEEL the women responding
to you in a positive way and not trying to ignore
you or get away from you when you act like a wuss-
bag. They are always laughing and smiling and even
THEY tend to get touchy-feely, asking me for MY
number and then calling ME (of course, I always
get their numbers too) or asking me to call them,
asking me when we're going out, and even asking ME
for sex. I could not believe it! And often, this
could happen within minutes or hours of
meeting...not weeks, months, or years like I once
thought it took. I suggest all guys especially the
skeptics out there to get your stuff. It works!

What I LOVE is how you say making it look like as
if a woman is picking YOU up. It sure takes the
pressure off of the situation. It's all in the
mind set. You are not nervous because you know she
wants you and is trying to get you...not the other
way around. Then you act accordingly. Here's just
a few of the lines I use:

"Look, just because you're being sweet to me
doesn't mean I'm going to sleep with you. What?
You
thought I was THAT easy? Common!"

(with women at work or women working somewhere)
"How can you possibly get any work done when
you're flirting with me all the time? I know I'm a
stud and all but if you lose your job, don't think
I'm going to support you!"

(after seeing a woman) "I know we had fun, but
please don't become a stalker and call me 50 times
a day or else I'll have the cops pay you a visit
with a restraining order in hand!"

(If a woman hints at sex or sometimes I'll bring
it up)

"I don't know if I could have sex with you...what
if you could only last 2 minutes? I don't know if
you can even kiss...I tell you what, I'll THINK
about it" (then I kiss her)

(cocky+funny for a common situation)

Her: "How are you?"

Me: "Well, I've been told I'm pretty damn good!"
with a 'wink'

(If a woman walks past me)

Me: "What are you doing" (or where are you going?)

Her: "I'm going to such and such or I'm doing such
and such"

Me: "You're a lousy liar......It's really
ok to admit you were just trying to get a look at
me... and as long as you're not a stalker, I may
give you a chance!"

(If she makes fun of herself) Her: "I'm such a
retard" or "My hair looks awful" or "My lipstick
doesn't look good does it?"

Me: "Well, I didn't want to say anything!" lol
"But
I think those guys over there were thinking
'What's
her problem? She's so clueless!"

Her: "My hair looks bad doesn't it?" (or any other
line where she makes fun of herself)

Me: "You can say that again!" (with a playful
tone)

I love it! I love it! With this type of
communication, they react SO differently! A lot of
times, they will break down and admit they DO like
me! And this keeps you out of the "lets just be
friends" category and reduces the number of fake
numbers and blow-offs you get from women. It also
keeps you from appearing "TOO NICE". AND I don't
have to CHASE them anymore! It's a wonderful
feeling. Now on the other hand, what if you said:

"I bet you have a boyfriend, right?"

"Hey baby, you're so beautiful!"

"Can I take you out sometime?"

"Oh, baby, there's nothing wrong with you! You're
gorgeous!"

AH! David, just like you say...THIS STUFF IS
TERRIBLE! Wuss, kiss-ass behavior at its best!

It's so lame, so boring, and so wussie, and so
blah! Using cocky+funny, we can have more fun
without sounding like a loser plus women respond
1,000,000% times better with cocky+funny. Probably
only 1-2% of the male population know what
cocky+funny is and probably half of those do it
without realizing it. This type of communication
is DIFFERENT from what MOST guys do which makes
you stand out! But it's a lot like water. For
water (H20), you need 2 hydrogen atoms and one
oxygen atom. If not then you get some other
element you aren't looking for. You have to have
the right mixture of cocky AND funny or else it
doesn't work as well (although sheer cockiness
with
mild humor CAN work to a degree).

Now, I have a question and observation that is
important to me, David. SOMETIMES when I throw out
a cocky+funny response, they will say "Oh
whatever!" or roll their eyes or say you're mean,
get mad, or something like that and walk away.
This happens not often but on rare occasions.
These women are probably uptight anyways and not
worth getting know. When they say "whatever" or
"You're so mean" and they're laughing or smiling,
and they still keep talking to me, then I know
it's working. Also, when you say something like:
"...Oh quit lying, you were just walking near me
because you want me" and they say "No, I don't
want
you" or "No I wasn't, I was just doing _ _ _ _ _"
in a semi-serious tone, how do you respond to that
to keep the cocky+funny going? In other words,
what do you do when they act as if they ARENT
picking you up?

Thanks a million Dave...you've changed my life
forever... seriously.

GT from Nashville, Tennessee

>>>MY COMMENTS:

OK, so let's talk about the great comments that
you've shared, and then I'll address your
question...

I was amazed when I first realized that you
could actually turn the tables around, pretend
that you're trying to "resist her advances," and
make fun of her for trying to "put the moves on
you"... and wind up having the woman you're
talking to actually start feeling attracted to you
as a result.

It really is amazing.

Now, I know that a lot of guys hear this
approach and think, "Yeah, right. There's no way
that just pretending that a woman is pursuing you
will MAKE her pursue you"...

But this isn't just any old common way of
"pretending."

What you're doing here is a very special, Cocky
& Funny, flirty, engaging way of pretending.

I'm sure you've watched the Discovery Channel,
and seen animals "play-fighting." It's common
among young animals in particular.

Now, how do animals know that it's only "play,"
as opposed to "real" fighting?

I mean, have you ever seen the way some
animals, like lion cubs and wolf pups jump on and
bite each other?

It certainly LOOKS like real fighting.

But it's not... it's play.

Well there's a very similar thing that happens
when you flirt with a woman using the Cocky &
Funny technique... and when you use this further
to pretend that she's trying to "pick you up" and
you're "resisting her advances."

You have to use just a LITTLE EXTRA drama.

You have to be a little "overly suspicious"
with your tone.

You have to act just a little too serious and
offended.

These little cues, along with a good sense of
humor and timing are the hints and triggers that
make a woman instantly switch into "Oh, this is
play" mode, instead of behaving as if you're a
loser who has no imagination.

There are some other key benefits as well, as
you mentioned above, when you're using this
approach.

One is that you don't come across as nervous or
intimidated. The fact that you're turning the
tables around, having fun, and acting like you're
something special sends the message that you're
totally cool, calm, and comfortable in your own
skin... and, in fact, you're SO comfortable that
you're going to go immediately to "play" mode.

Another is that it gives you a "character role"
to play that is the OPPOSITE of being a WUSS. This
is handy, as most guys switch quickly into Wuss
mode when they start talking to an attractive
woman.

Finally, it gives you all kinds of great ways
to end the interaction...

You can say:

"OK, well I'm not going to give you my number,
but you can write down your email for me, and
maybe I'll get back to you sometime..." etc.

It even makes taking things to the next level
easy and charming, because you're "resisting
forward."

A quick personal story:

I was at Hooters Restaurant yesterday afternoon
with a friend, and the waitress approached us to
get our order.

She walked over and said something like, "Hi,
can I get you something to drink?" etc.

I pretended not to notice her, and kept talking
to my friend.

Then, as she finished asking the question, I
turned to her with a surprised and "fake offended"
look on my face and said, "Oh, that's OK, I was
just TALKING" (as if she had interrupted me).

She opened her mouth with the "Oh, no you
didn't! I can't believe you just said that" look.

I shook my head at her.

Then my friend looked at her and said, "Wow,
you're very forward. Next thing she's going to be
asking for your phone number."

I shook my head at her again, and rolled my
eyes.

We gave her the drink order, and she went away.

She came back a few minutes later to tell me
that my drink was going to be delayed, because
they were making some kind of change in the
kitchen.

Of course, I threw up my hands in despair,
rolled my eyes at her, and shook my head (as if
she was disappointing me horribly).

She laughed and said, "Hey, you'd better watch
out, I might have to ask you for your phone
number"...

THAT FAST.

We had talked for a grand total of about a
minute, and she was already joking around about
asking me for my number.

Keep in mind, this is a HOOTERS waitress (and a
cute one, at that). She works in an environment
where hundreds of guys try to pick up on her, one
after the other...

Now, as you can imagine, this kind of thing
happens all the time when I interact with
waitresses, etc. I've found that it's no harder to
get a waitress to give you her email/number than
it is to get any other girl's info, by the way.

What's the secret?

Being playful, fun, different, Cocky & Funny,
and not acting like a Wuss who wants to call her
100 times a day and tell her how pretty she is.

Here's your question again:

"...SOMETIMES when I throw out a cocky+funny
response, they will say "Oh whatever!" or roll
their eyes or say you're mean, get mad, or
something like that and walk away. This happens
not often but on rare occasions. These women are
probably uptight anyways and not worth getting
know. When they say "whatever" or "You're so mean"
and they're laughing or smiling, and they still
keep talking to me, then I know it's working.
Also, when you say something like: "...Oh quit
lying, you were just walking near me because you
want me" and they say "No, I don't want you" or
"No
I wasn't, I was just doing _ _ _ _ _" in a semi-
serious tone, how do you respond to that to keep
the cocky+funny going? In other words, what do you
do when they act as if they ARENT picking you
up?..."

What I'm about to tell you is sometimes hard
for guys to accept, so get ready.

SOME PEOPLE DON'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR.

No, really.

My guess is that something like 60%-80% of the
population just plain aren't very interesting or
fun to talk to.

Some people are actually ARROGANT about their
lack of a sense of humor.

These are my personal favorites.

I remember meeting a girl at a bar a couple of
years ago.

I was in Hollywood, CA at a fancy bar, and she
was one of these "I'm a beautiful actress, and I
know it" types.

I was ordering a drink, and she bumped into me.

I turned and said, "Don't touch me!"

She just looked at me with a "You're a jerk"
look, and leaned away from me.

I smiled at her and said, "It was a joke, it's
OK" (with kind of a slightly sarcastic "you didn't
get it" tone of voice).

She said something like, "Well, it wasn't
funny. You seem like an arrogant jerk."

LOL!

I couldn't help myself... I burst into
laughter.

She, of course, got even more annoyed.

Now, most guys would have gotten all upset,
thought that they must have done something majorly
wrong, and tried to apologize and get the woman to
like them.

I immediately recognized this girl as a person
who just plain doesn't have a sharp sense of
humor, and who is probably a HUGE pain in the ass
to deal with in real life... so I laughed at her.

You'll notice that a lot of guys write in to
the Mailbags with questions like, "I'm dating four
women right now, and they're all wonderful, but
there's this ONE girl that I just can't get... how
do I make the one that isn't interested LIKE me?"

This is a curious thing.

We humans always want the approval of the
person who doesn't want to give it to us.

Instead of just walking away and saying, "your
loss," we often chase after them, begging and
pleading for their approval... and thinking that
we must have done something wrong.

Remember, some people actually ENJOY making
other people feel bad. Some women actually ENJOY
rejecting men. It gives them a feeling of power.

There are MANY women who will spend all week
shopping, two hours putting on their clothing and
makeup (and doing their hair), just to go out and
get attention from men... so they can reject those
men, and complain to their friends about what
"losers" and "pigs" men are, and how they hate it
when men look at them like a "piece of meat."

Go figure.

Let me give you a little "tough love."

Part of growing up, becoming a REAL MAN, and
getting this area of your life handled is
realizing that not all women are nice people, and
not letting those that aren't nice AFFECT YOU.

You can reach a point in your life where your
attitude should become "I do not give anyone
permission to take my joy, happiness, and good
mood away from me."

When you get to this point, then IT DOESN'T
MATTER if a woman doesn't respond positively to
your approach.

It doesn't matter if she rejects you.

It doesn't matter if she doesn't have a sense
of humor.

None of this matters when you don't give anyone
permission to TAKE YOUR JOY AWAY FROM YOU.

My advice: Learn to walk away. Learn to blow it
off. Learn how to IMMEDIATELY disconnect and
detach from these types of situations, and NOT let
them affect you.

The "numbers game" goes both ways.

If you start meeting a lot of women, you will,
by nature of meeting a LOT of women, meet quite a
few that don't have a sense of humor, aren't
friendly, aren't available, etc.

You need to learn the skill of keeping your
power and joy for yourself, and NEVER giving it to
someone you don't even know.

Make a decision right now that your joy is your
own, and that you'll never allow another person to
take it away from you.

Dude, someone give me a hug.

OK... on a more serious note...

If you've been reading my newsletters for
awhile, or you've had a chance to download a copy
of my eBook or check out my Advanced Series, then
you know that I really believe it's important to
get your "inner game" handled.

By "inner game," I mean things like your
emotions, your outlook on life, your "mental map"
of how things work between men and women, etc.

It took me a long time, and a lot of trial and
error to find the things that REALLY work best
when it comes to making women feel that powerful
emotion called ATTRACTION.

And one of the most important things that I
realized is that if you don't get your INNER GAME
together, and learn how to THINK about women and
dating, all the techniques in the world aren't
going to help you very much.

In my Advanced Series, I spend several HOURS
going over everything from the evolution of human
mating to the beliefs and attitudes of guys who
are "naturally" good with women.

I think it's important to change the way you
THINK as you change the way you BEHAVE.

Women use little clues to figure out if you're
the "real deal" or if you're just "faking it."

If you don't BELIEVE in what you're doing, then
you're going to come across as a fake. You'll feel
like you're being "manipulative"... and like a
fraud.

When you UNDERSTAND what is happening, how and
why women act the way they do, and how to make
women feel ATTRACTION, then your behaviors feel
"right" and they come across as AUTHENTIC...
because they ARE.

2008-07-11T07:32:00.000-07:00

***QUESTION***

Dave:

On your audio series, you talk about getting past
the fluff and "talk to that other part of the
woman" How do you do that? I answer ads on the
personals, and I keep thinking that my dialogue
with these women is all wrong.

I know you gotta be C&F, but sometimes there's not
much to go on from an online profile. Here's an
example from a girl that lives in my neighborhood:

"I'd like to eventually settle down with someone
that I can look to as a best friend and that I can
laugh with. I enjoy traveling, working out, yoga,
music, and dining out in NYC. I am playful and fun
and have a lot to offer the right man. I believe
that the best relationships are based on
friendship. I am genuine, kind and compassionate
and I am looking for the same in a man.

My ideal match is the kind of guy that isn't
afraid of being himself. He knows what he wants
and goes for it. He is confident, not cocky. He is
a person of good character, high morals and loyal.
He is thoughtful, considerate and knows how to
treat a lady. Last but not least, my ideal man is
attractive with a good sense of humor".

I can't think of anything cocky to say to
this...or how to communicate that I'm a sexually
aware man. I'm not really sure what you mean by
sexually aware anyway, unless you mean sexually
successful...like when you know you're hot and
women want you.

So, can you help me understand how you'd respond
to an ad like this?

thanks,

-R

>>>MY COMMENTS:

OK, first of all, I recommend that you go back
through the CD Audio Program, and pay attention to
the workbook that came with it.

I actually included a sample "cut and paste"
type of answer for personal ads that works very
well.

In fact, when I originally published it in one
of these dating tips newsletters, I had literally
dozens and dozens of guys from all around the
world who wrote in saying that they cut and pasted
it and sent it out in response to women's personal
ads... and had fabulous response.

Now, let me address a few of your comments...

To summarize what I think about your situation,
I'd say that you probably need to keep reviewing
the material that you have, and keep practicing.

If you have little experience with women, then
you have almost no frame of reference for what I'm
talking about in general. Until you start DOING
more, you just won't "get it" as well.

As far as responding to a woman's online
personal ad...

Remember, women who run personal ads are
getting TONS of responses.

If you're going to play the personals, stay
current with them, and contact women as soon as
they place their ad. This way you'll be one of the
first to start a conversation with her... as
opposed to the 497th guy. At some point, the
hundreds of men who are responding to a woman's
personal ad all run together into a big lump of
desperate men. So, be first if you can.

Secondly, forget about trying to respond to a
woman's personal ad by reading it, thinking about
it, considering what she's looking for, and then
responding in a way that she will find
interesting.

No no no!

The ad you sent above could have been written
by any woman in any part of the world... it might
as well be a generic ad template for women.

The one thing this ad DOESN'T mention (and the
one thing that NO female personal ads EVER
mention) is what makes this woman feel ATTRACTION
for a man.

Think about it for a minute...

This woman sat down one night at her computer,
and said to herself:

"I'm tired of the dating game. Maybe if I put a
personal ad online and describe the kind of guy
I'm looking for, Prince Charming will find me and
we'll live happily ever after."

Can't you just FEEL it in her words?

"I'd like to eventually settle down with someone
that I can look to as a best friend and that I can
laugh with..."

"I believe that the best relationships are based
on friendship..."

And the whole last paragraph is priceless...

"My ideal match is the kind of guy that isn't
afraid of being himself. He knows what he wants
and goes for it. He is confident, not cocky. He is
a person of good character, high morals and loyal.
He is thoughtful, considerate and knows how to
treat a lady. Last but not least, my ideal man is
attractive with a good sense of humor..."

So what do most guys do when they read an ad
like this one?

Of course... they write back something like:

"Hi, I'm a nice attractive SWM who has a sense of
humor, high morals, is honest, and also believes
that a good friendship is the foundation for a
great relationship."

UGH!

Someone bring me a bucket, because I'm gonna
PUKE.

Look... when a woman is writing a PERSONAL ad,
she's usually at a point in her life where she's
lonely... and has often lost hope of finding a
long-term companion in the real world.

OF COURSE she's going to write all this sappy
stuff.

But that doesn't change ANYTHING about what is
going to get her attention and make her feel
ATTRACTION.

Again, my gut tells me that you're trying to
figure out how to answer this kind of personal ad
with a WUSSY response that will make her love you.

Don't.

And to address your question of how to
communicate that you're a confident, sexually
aware man...

You do this by NOT trying to please her, saying
what she wants to hear, and kissing up to her.

It sounds to me like you need to spend more
time studying the materials you have, practicing
your Cocky & Funny skills, and making your
personality more interesting... and less time
chasing women who are looking for an open, honest,
Yoga-loving husband via the personal ads.

Use the materials you have!

Practice!

Get online with an instant messaging service
and work on your Cocky & Funny. Copy and paste the
personal ad response in your Advanced CD Series
and use it to answer personal ads.

Until you're REALLY good at engineering, quit
trying to reinvent the wheel.

***QUESTION***

Dave:

I've noticed that on your newsletters or e-book
you haven't commented on hypnotic language which
some guys use to seduce women. Is it worth
looking into or is it more work than its worth?
What is your opinion on this subject? I know that
with your vast amount of knowledge, you have a
worthwhile opinion in this area.

Thanks RF, NYC

>>>MY COMMENTS:

I've tried all this stuff... and, in fact, I
know quite a bit about the topic of "hypnosis." I
was fascinated by it several years ago... and, for
certain things, it seems to be of great use.

But, if you try it, you'll find just as I did
that it's a very INDIRECT way to accomplish your
objective. It's very abnormal and it feels
sneaky.

Once you understand that you can actually cause
women to feel ATTRACTION for you by just
cultivating certain natural personality traits,
like confidence and humor, all else becomes
irrelevant.

I know a lot of guys who are successful with
women, and the general consensus is that you MUST
get your inner game together FIRST. You must
understand how and why women are attracted to men
FIRST. Then, you must cultivate the ability to
make women feel that ATTRACTION for you with just
your communication and body language.

Once you learn this skill, you can use ANYTHING
and it will work.

In other words, once you're good at meeting
women, you can use juggling fire to meet women...
and it will work.

But, if you DON'T "get it" and understand what
makes women feel ATTRACTION for men, then no
amount of tricks, hypnosis, or standing on your
head is going to make a damn bit of difference.

I don't think that most guys want to have to
"seduce" women. I think that most guys want women
to feel ATTRACTION for them.

Here's a definition for "seduction":

"The act of seducing; enticement to wrong doing;
specifically, the offense of inducing a woman to
consent to unlawful sexual intercourse, by
enticements which overcome her scruples; the wrong
or crime of persuading a woman to surrender her
chastity."

Techniques to "seduce" women make your stomach
feel strange... because they're usually dishonest
or sneaky.

And techniques to seduce women that involve
using things like hypnosis and other covert mind-
control not only make your stomach turn when you
use them, but they also don't WORK as well as the
things I'm teaching you.

***QUESTION***

To my mate, Dave. The main question I want to ask
is in regards to going out by myself. I walk
inside a club or a bar and I always get asked the
same old question .."Who are you here with". I
typically answer by myself. This causes
uncertainty and I feel that I am telling the lady
'Ohh, well I am lonely' (Note that the same
happens with guys & mind you, I am straight). The
answer, by myself is honest but triggers a
negative outcome, so what do I say?

For some silly reason I get the impression that
the other person is thinking to themselves, "ohh,
the poor thing".

I tend to prefer to go out by myself since there
are times that I have to do extra favours and more
things to get accepted with my mates and also they
are a lot of times when they act just plain
negative which as an old Greek proverb says "Show
me your mates so I can see who you are" (if you
know what I mean). So, for the last few years I
have made a stance that I will do things
independently and work out things by myself and
that I don't need others. Note that this can
become an extremely long story so I will get back
to the topic.

One very bad thought I have, is if a women sees a
guy approach her by himself, she automatically
thinks, ok, this guy has no social life, he is
lonely and he must be desperate, so quickly what
do I do to turn him off. Look, your advice on the
CD does help but I personally think that a lot of
this stuff takes time and effort and should not be
looked as a quick aspirin cure.

PLEASE!!!! tell me the following questions:- - If
a guy or a girl asks me "who am I here with" what
is a good answer? - Is it natural for a guy to go
out by himself? (i.e are there other guys who do
the same?)

Awaiting your response.

From "Il" Australia

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Wow, these are great questions...

I think you've hit on a couple of topics that
are MAJOR issues for a lot of men.

I know that they were for me in the not-too-
distant past.

OK, to answer your question about what to do if
a woman asks, "Who are you here with?"...

It's time for Dr. Dave, The Mind Reading Dating
Psychologist, to make an appearance...

I'm going to make a few guesses about what's
going through your mind.

Hell, since I'm making some guesses, let's just
wrap up both of your questions into one:

"Is it cool to go out alone, and what should I
do if I'm out alone and a woman asks me who I'm
with?"

My first guess is that you're feeling self-
conscious about the idea of being alone.

You said:

"One very bad thought I have is if a woman sees a
guy approach her by himself, she automatically
thinks, ok, this guy has no social life, he is
lonely and he must be desperate, so quickly, what
do I do to turn him off?"

It's obvious that you have all kinds of
insecurity issues here, and they're really messing
with your mind.

The next guess I have is that you're still
stuck in the mind set of "pleasing women" and
"saying what they want to hear".

At some level, you're asking me what to say to
a woman who DISAPPROVES of the idea that you're
out alone.

Are you with me here?

Here are a few pointers for you:

1) What other people think of you is the last
thing you should be thinking about.

Now, don't take this to mean that you should
never change your underwear or brush your teeth
because it doesn't matter what others think.

That's not what I'm saying.

What I AM saying is that if you go out alone,
and you meet a woman who thinks you're a TOTAL
LOSER for not being out with friends, it shouldn't
matter to you.

You're not looking for THAT woman.

2) Going out alone is great.

I used to be VERY uptight about the idea of
going out alone. It took me quite awhile before I
was really comfortable with the idea.

And when women would ask me about it, I'd try
to figure out some good excuse to give them... or
way to explain it so I didn't appear to be a
loser.

Well guess what I've learned since?

Most of the guys I know who are AMAZING with
women go out alone... often.

In fact, if you really think about it, a guy
who has the confidence to go out alone, KNOWING
that he's going to meet a woman that he enjoys...
and is keeping his options open, so if he chooses
to go home with her, etc. he can... is amazing.

That takes balls.

3) When a woman asks you "Who are you here with?",
you have a few basic options.

- You can answer her directly ("I'm here alone") -
You can lie ("My friends will be here soon") - You
can turn the question around (read on).

Now, if you answer directly and say, "I'm here
alone" in a weak, tentative, self conscious,
insecure voice, you're going to look like a Wuss
Bag loser.

Women aren't attracted to men who feel like
losers.

And answering questions directly is usually
uninteresting.

You can also lie.

A lot of guys lie about things... from what
they do to what they think of a woman... to how
much they make.

Lying is a trap because it makes you feel bad,
AND it screws up your mind. I don't recommend it.

But there is another way!

And it's my favorite (of course).

TURN THE QUESTION AROUND.

If you remember that women are CONSTANTLY
testing you when you interact with them, and you
are always looking for places and ways to
demonstrate your Cocky & Funny wit, you'll see
incredible opportunity in situations like this.

She asks, "Who are you here with?"

You answer, "I'm here with you."

Seeeee?

She smiles, laughs a little and says, "OK,
seriously... who are you here with?"

You answer, "Look, I only know you a few
minutes and already you're trying to meet my
friends? By the end of the week you're going to be
over at my mom's house talking about our wedding.
Slow down!"

Now what's going on here?

What you're subtly saying is, "It doesn't
matter who I'm here with... and by the way, If I
am here by myself, I'm not at all insecure about
it..."

Guys ask me all the time how to deal with
questions and challenges from women.

DON'T.

You don't have to.

Just be charming, funny, and difficult.

It works much better, and it's a hell of a lot
more fun for you and her.

***QUESTION***

Hey Dave you are right the C & F seem to work but
I wanna ask you something...how often are you
supposed to be c & f? I mean, are yu supposed to
sprinkle it in during a normal convo or should yu
use it moderately or at every single thing she
says? I ask b/c id like to hold a normal convo
also & in your opinion wat would be best? Im
interested in your opinion on this.

CJ, New York

>>>MY COMMENTS:

The more you use it, the more you'll get a feel
for how much to use Cocky & Funny.

Use it a LOT in the beginning, on the first
outing for a cup of tea, during the first dates,
etc.

The exception is if you don't have a lot of
time, and you want to get a woman's number/email
fast. In that case, use the 3 minute technique I
talk about in Double Your Dating, and as described
in a past newsletter that you've probably read. In
those cases, it takes too much time.

Also, as you get to know a woman, you'll have
more and more "normal" conversations...

Never stop being Cocky & Funny, unpredictable,
etc.

But you can ease up a little as you get to know
a woman better.

Use it... and you'll get it.

***QUESTION***

Dave,

You are absolutely, positively the man.... I
always thought to myself, there should be more
literature on the subject of "Meeting Beautiful
Chicks." Your ebook is the answer...You can go to
a bookstore and get all types of how-to books on
things that exist in the physical world, i.e.,
fixing a car, etc. But never about things that
exist in the mental world, at least not for the
things that matter such as picking up chicks....
Like I said before your ebook is the answer! I
suggest anyone reading this email that has not
picked up at least the ebook, to DO IT NOW!! Its
worth it dude.... Trust me...

Since reading the ebook and making minimal changes
in my game... I have been able to consistently
pick up at least one chick per week, but I need
the advanced series to really get my game on
point... I think that will assist with picking up
the 9's and 10's... not just the 6's and 7's. I'll
be picking that up next week to move to the next
level!!

In the meantime here's my reflection and a
question that should be helpful to others once
answered.

Here's my story.

I'm a 30-Year-old African American Male, who was
voted best looking in High School, and I make over
100K/year.... So I generally do not have that hard
of a time initially meeting women... But would
always screw it up with the women that I really
found interesting... I was being a wuss...

I'd meet multiple women in a night out with the
boys... There would be the one's that I really
liked... The 9+'s, and the one's that I kinda
liked, but was not too excited about... The 6's
and 7's

The way I approached the 9+ was all wussie...and I
usually never even got the phone number, but if I
did, I would immediately try to make her like me,
be a general pain in the ass, calling all the
time, etc. And not get anywhere past an initial
phone conversation.

The way that I approached the 7 was different
because I did not feel intimidated by her...and
most importantly could kinda care less if I spoke
to her or not... I usually had no fear of telling
a joke, or busting on her... The result being that
she sensed the confidence and really liked me...If
it progressed any further she would always reach
out to me.... calling all the time, and be a
general pain in the ass...

So my question is this:

How can I make the same response happen with women
that I am interested in? The hot, intelligent,
9's and 10's...The ebook has helped tremendously,
but I'm not there yet..

Is there some mental trick that I can play so that
I act the same way with all women (cock/funny),
Not just 6's and 7's????

Your help is much appreciated, and much success my
friend you deserve it!!

KT Atlanta, GA

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, you're certainly on the right track...

By the way, congratulations on getting up to
speed and being able to meet one woman every week.

For a lot of guys, that's like saying you can
levitate into the air and fly.

Keep it up, you're getting close!

As for the REALLY attractive women, there are a
few things you need to keep in mind:

1) These women are approached A LOT. And I mean
ALL THE TIME. The real hotties of the world are so
used to being approached by men that they should
all be given honorary black belts in Wuss
Detection And Deflection.

Super hot women have a lot of choice when it
comes to men, so they choose the best they can
get.

If your game isn't REALLY together, you'll do
little things when you're interacting with these
women that will clue them in to the fact that you
don't really know how to play on their level.

And I'm talking LITTLE things.

Remember, these women are approached all the
time by men, and they have learned to make very
quick decisions based on very little information.

A little comment, a certain look, or a little
gesture that hints to her that you want her
approval is all it takes.

You're doing fine... you'll get it soon enough.

Just stick with it.

You're asking me how to meet the kinds of women
that most men would sell their mom into slavery
for one date with.

You're on the right track, and the more you
practice and improve, the more success you'll
have.

***QUESTION***

Dave,

Hello Dave, my question is has follows: What
your opinion on women that work has exotic
dancers? I've generally heard that they have some
type of issue where they feel they need to
dominate/control men, now obviously we can't
stereotype all of them, but generally speaking
what's the scoop on these types of women? A
response would be appreciated.

M San Antonio,TX

>>>MY COMMENTS:

BUST THEIR BALLS!

Dancers are notorious for dating brutish,
abusive, loser guys who have no life...

Dancers usually have all kinds of issues...

Dancers are used to men kissing up to them and
giving them money just to look at them...

BUST THEIR BALLS!

Tell them they're the most successful sex
change you've seen lately.

Ask them what they're going to be when they
grow up.

Don't look at them while they're dancing.

If you play their game, you become another one
of the hundreds of dumb-ass guys that they take
money from.

If you completely avoid their game and instead
play your own, you will stand out.

This is where EXTREME ball busting and Cocky &
Funny are most useful.

WARNING:

Be careful what you wish for.

You are looking for trouble if you don't know
how to handle powerful women.

If you're not careful, you're going to email me
next week saying, "Wow, that ball busting stuff
really works with dancers. The only problem is
that she stole my car and all my money, and now
her drug dealer is calling me all the time to find
out where she is..."

If you want a first-class ticket to a Quentin
Tarantino movie, start dating a lot of dancers.

And no, I'm not talking Jackie Brown kind of
freaky, I'm talking FOUR ROOMS kind of freaky.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

***QUESTION***

Dear Dave, I have been reading your newsletter for
about a year now and it works great!! True
genius!!! I have always been cocky and funny even
before knowing what c&f was, you just helped me
realize exactly why I was succeeding with women.
There is this girl who is probably a 9-10, but has
had a boyfriend for some time now. I have been
cocky and funny with her since the day i met her
(btw she's a bartender) and she really seems to
respond to it. She poured me a drink once and
after I tasted it I said to her "whoa this is
really strong, are you trying to get me drunk to
take advantage of me," and she responded by saying
"oh yea baby" and smiled at me and rubbed my arm.
My question is as follows: I really want this girl
and she seems to respond to my cocky and funny
routine, in fact I think she likes me, but what do
I do about the boyfriend situation?? What are the
odds I can actually end up with this chick??

GB Orlando

>>>MY COMMENTS:

OK, so what you're trying to tell me is that
the only attractive woman in ORLANDO, FLORIDA is a
bartender with a long term boyfriend?

Hey, good idea...since there are only about a
million or so single women in your area, why not
pick one who's already seeing someone?

Duh.

Stop that!

If a woman has a boyfriend, just walk away,
man.

Every month or two, when you're ordering a
drink from her say, "Hey, are you still married?"

This is funny because you're busting on her and
at the same time asking if she's still with her
BF.

At some point she'll probably say, "No, I just
dumped him". Most relationships end, so stay in
touch.

And in the meantime, do something productive
with your time... like dating some of the single
women in your area, who don't have boyfriends that
are probably the jealous 6'6" 250 pound meathead
bouncer at the bar who likes to beat up guys for
fun.

***COMMENT***

All I can tell you is, the guys without money
(some of whom are naturally cocky and funny) get
no women; the guys with money, whether they're
ugly, fat, or dull have the women pursuing them.
That's reality-- I've seen it happen so many times
that it's become a standing joke among all the
single guys I know! Around here (Chicago), a woman
ascertains a man's earning potential within five
minutes of meeting, and if he's lacking, she is
gone in a cloud of dust!

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, what you're saying makes perfect
sense.

Except, how do you explain the probably 2 or 3
million adult men in the Chicago area who have a
lot to middle class income who are MARRIED?

I have a good friend who lives in Chicago who I
personally watched get 25 different women's phone
numbers in the course of one weekend.

He lived in a little apartment with a couple of
other people, made very little money, and dressed
casually.

I think you need to get some new friends.

Try making friends with guys who are SUCCESSFUL
with women, instead of guys who like to sit around
coming up with "standing jokes" about why they
suck with women.

Sure, money helps. Duh.

But money doesn't create ATTRACTION. Sorry.

Get rid of your helpless mentality, and get out
there and make something happen for yourself!

Making excuses for why you can't succeed
personally in life is one of the WORST uses for
your amazing mind.

Stop it!

***QUESTION***

What up dave? There's no longer any doubt that
this stuff works! It's really great to actually
know what you're doing when dealing with women,
rather than aimlessly trying to meet them.. anyway
my question.. I met this chick at a party and
before she left, i asked her if she had e-mail.
She said, "how about my phone number?" I told her
that it's hard to get people on the phone but i'd
take it., she then writes her # down and said "I
wrote my e-mail down too but I'll think you're a
dork if you e-mail me, kind of jokingly. (WHY THE
HELL DID SHE GIVE IT TO ME THEN!!!!!?) Then, other
guys/friends delayed her leaving. so while i was
back with my friends, she came where i was sitting
right before she left and said., "you're going to
call me right", smiling. i was already kind of
drunk and i just nodded and said 'yeah' in an
indifferent tone cause i knew she liked me.. but i
could've said something better!!

2 QUESTIONS

1. What would have been cocky+funny thing to say
when she said .."but I'll think you're a dork if
you e-mail me.." and should i then proceed to e-
mail!?

2. When she comes back and asks if I'm going to
call her, what's the best thing i can say to bust
on her in this situation?

I appreciate everything you're doing, David.
please keep the newsletters coming!

--D Jax, FL

>>>MY COMMENTS:

To answer the "I'll think you're a dork if you
email me" I probably would have said:

"You'll think I'M a dork? Hey, you're the dorky
CHICK who has email..."

And when a woman says, "you're going to call
me, right?" it means that she's REALLY into you...
as you know.

So why not smile and say, "Why should I? What's
in it for me?"

Then, when she says, "What do you want?" you
can answer with all kinds of great things...

"Money"

"Can you cook?"

"Can I have anything I want?" (my personal
favorite)

...this is a great line of humor, and women
love it.

***QUESTION***

Hi David,

thanks for all your great info that i have been
receiving over the past several months. i have
been putting into practice the things i learned
from your e-book and newsletters with much
improved results in the dating scene...........in
a few of your newsletters you mentioned that
jealousy is the strongest of all emotions. how do
you deal with it if it is the woman who tries to
make you jealous. what's the best mindset and way
to handle it David.

d London

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Jealousy is an interesting topic.

I'm not sure that I said it was the "strongest"
of all emotions... but I probably did say that it
was one of the most powerful.

Jealousy causes people to do all sorts of
stupid things... but it can also keep
relationships together.

If a woman knows that other women are
interested in you, she'll want you more.

If a man finds out that his girl is sleeping
with another man, he can fly into a rage that
often leads to violence (or worse).

Women are notorious for trying to make men
jealous.

Many women intuitively realize that jealousy
will make a man more interested and make him work
harder for her attention and affection.

If a woman tries to make me jealous, I just
laugh.

If she says:

"Oh, this guy I used to date called me last night
to see if I was single..."

I might laugh and say:

"Well you should go out with him."

At this point a woman will usually realize that
what she's doing isn't working and say, "No, I
don't like him, why did you say that?"

It's important to overcome the natural tendency
in life to have your emotions triggered by outside
events.

It takes some work in many cases, but it's
worth it.

Jealousy is an almost useless emotion. Do your
best to realize that you don't need it... and then
communicate that you're not easily played... and
you don't get jealous over other men.

Works wonders, and makes you even more
attractive.

***QUESTION***

I met this girl...and I know that she is the one
for me. I can feel it, and have felt if since I
first met her. At first, I can tell she was
attracted to me...we hung out for like 13 hrs the
first time we ever met, went out after that, and I
had used the cocky - making fun of her thing. Then
I got all wuss like and told her how I felt.

Now, we don't see each other all that often, I know
that she has gone out with another guy, and she
told me that he was a total dick to her.

Question is...can I get her attraction to me back
by starting to do the cocky thing again??? This
along with talking about other women that I am
talking to and hanging out with...would this
possibly get her interest back in me??? I need
help on this. Thanks J

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yeah, you need help on this.

HELLO?

Why did you stop doing what worked originally?

Don't make me come down there and shake you!

You're probably out of luck at this point, but
if you want to try and MAKE some luck, then get
back to doing what works.

You don't need me to tell you this stuff again.

Don't be a Wussy, man. Women aren't attracted
to Wussies.

***QUESTION***

Hey Dave,

I read your ebook a few weeks ago and like
everyone else, I am going to suck up to you and
say its great. These tips really helped me out in
the dating life. To the problem, I've known this
Italian girl since the summer. It started out as
an Internet thing in a chat room as with my natural
humor and new set of balls, I got hooked into me.
Fast forward to a few months in November, we still
kept talking and views me as a "Friend", even
though we didn't even send a single picture to one
another. Things are going so well, that *she*
decides that we should meet up somewhere. We did,
and I bet every reader in this room would be very
very very jealous if they saw me with this girl.

Things went well on this "get together", I busted
her balls, made her laugh, and her facial
expressions were mostly "What the.." look with
sometimes leaving her speechless. At the end, she
said I was definitely a keeper..wee. Fast forward
to a few days ago, and now she tells me that she
had sex with her ex-boyfriend who "she loved" and
hasn't seen a long time. The reason why they
broke up is because he had to move, they were both
in good terms. Even though the ex is currently
seeing someone else, who he claims he is not
interested in this "other", they still did it. She
said at the end that she views me as a "friend"

My question: What gives? She was taking
initiative to even *ask* me out, which is
something that 0.001% of girls ask for, she
compliments me, kisses me, the whole package, yet
just a few days ago she tells me that she loves
her ex?

For some reason I am going to get the feeling you
are going to go on with my life, wish I could, but
even though I did "double my dating", my dates
haven't been all that fulfilling. Lets say my
best date besides this one was some Swedish Figure
Skater who kept talking about her past 90000
boyfriends.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Oh, yeah. I really feel for you.

In the months since you've been reading these
newsletters and few WEEKS since you've read my
book you've dated a super-hot Italian girl and a
Swedish Figure Skater.

And your dates haven't been "all that
fulfilling."

Bummer, man.

OK, as for your Italian girl who slept with her
ex.

These things happen, man.

Welcome to life on Earth.

My book is called "Double Your Dating," not
"How To Make Sure Every Relationship With Every
Woman In Your Life Turns Out Like A Movie."

Get out there and date some more women!

That'll get your mind off of the Italian girl
(who you obviously feel attached to)... and onto
some other super-babes that you have yet to meet.

***QUESTION***

Hi Dave,

Well I've read your e-book for about the 4th time
now. I'm most likely going to read it at least
that many more times. I'm just starting to put
your teachings into the real world. The first time
out I was with 2 of my buddies and 2 women that
they both new a lot better than I did. One girl is
a 8/9 the other is a solid 9. Well my buddy was in
the process on dating the 8/9 so I started to work
on the 9. I did the C/F routine, but I think I was
a little short on the funny but after all my
teasing and busting she still smiled and laughed.
I told her some stuff about how "hotties" view men
and how beauty was like a curse to them. She
seemed to look at me like I could read her mind.
But after that she kind of drifted from me and
eventually went over by the guys that I bet her
would all sleep with her in a heartbeat.... who
all acted like ass kissers might I add. My
question is...did I scare her with my knowledge of
knowing so much of her game? Also it is really
hard for me to work in a group of people. How can
you really focus your skills when everybody is
always switching who they are talking to. I'd say
for a first time out it with my new tools it
wasn't a loss but more of a tie.

M Tampa

>>>MY COMMENTS:

A "tie?"

And what were you trying to do with this girl,
win a popularity contest?

Did you ask her for her email?

No.

Did you ask her for her number?

No.

Quit talking so much about losers who like to
kiss ass and act like Wussies, and start thinking
NEXT STEP.

Remember the bonus booklet that you got with
"Double Your Dating" called "Bridges?"

This booklet teaches you how to go from one
step to the next.

The principle is that you need to know where
you are going... and then take steps to get there.

What... did you expect this girl to jump on
your lap and say, "Let's get out of here!"?

Lighten up on being the profound guru a little,
and start thinking NEXT STEP.

You didn't have a "tie" here, you had a "I
didn't do what it takes to win" here.

***QUESTION***

Dear David,

I have been reading your emails for about 6 months
now, and I gotta tell you. You're words and
advice have helped me with my life more than
anything else *ever*. I have gone from getting a
date with maybe one average looking girl every 4
months, to getting 7 or 8 dates from very
beautiful women in less than 2 weeks. My
confidence is skyrocketing, and women I would have
automatically accepted before (based on their
above average looks) are now often unacceptable in
one way or another (usually due to neurotic
behavior).

I have been changing my patterns and even people at
work are noticing the difference. I am way more
confident when confronted by my boss. I have gone
so far as to make cocky/funny jokes at his expense
hehe (surprisingly, it had the same effect on him
as the women, he's started following me around,
YIKES). I am attempting to find humor in every
situation. Even being stalked by my massive...
scary... hulking, boss (God help me).

I am still not at the place I want to be, but like
anything new, practice makes perfect (I imagine
buying your book and DVD set may help too). I can
actually notice daily improvements as I apply
these principles to my life.

Thank you so much David. Who knows, I may even get
a raise ;)

Quick question: I have had so many girls talk to
me about their problems like right away. I agree
with what you say about becoming a dumping ground
and how it has 'wussy' written all over it. Do
you have a few examples of how I could stop this
behavior without scaring them off or making them
think I am some kind of a**hole?

YOU ROCK

SF, BC

>>>MY COMMENTS:

OK, first of all, congratulations on getting
7-8 dates from beautiful women in 2 weeks. You're
the man.

To answer your question about what to say to
women who start talking about their problems right
away...

Here's the deal.

When a woman starts talking about her problems,
what she's REALLY saying is, "I'm feeling bad
right now. I think that if I talk about my
problems I'll feel good... so that's what I'm
going to do."

I hope you're with me here.

Most guys go along with this, and try to be
"nice" about the whole affair.

If you're like I used to be, you actually TRY
TO HELP.

Well guess what?

This is a REALLY bad idea if you want a woman
to feel ATTRACTION for you.

The BEST thing to do in these situations is to
make her FEEL BETTER.

And being a "nice" Wuss Bag Girly-Man Therapist
isn't the way to do it.

Try this:

Next time a woman starts with the problems,
just interrupt her and say, "Hey, whoa... wait a
minute here... do I look like one of your
GIRLFRIENDS?"

She'll say, "No."

You say, "Great, then don't talk to me like I'm
one of them, OK?"

Continue with:

"If you want therapy, I'm going to have to
charge you at LEAST two hundred an hour... I'm
expensive. I'm in WAY too good of a mood to listen
to this stuff for free."

Now, you MUST remember something here.

You're NOT trying to come across like a
heartless bastard when you say this stuff.

What you ARE trying to say is, "Hey, you have
girlfriends, and their role is comforting you and
talking about things. I'm not your girlfriend. I'm
the person who you feel GOOD when you're around...
the one that cheers you up... the one that keeps
you interested."

This is a VERY important distinction.

You must understand and believe this when you
do it, or else you'll just come across like a
selfish prick.

I've done this exact thing NUMEROUS times in my
day, and almost EVERY time the woman stops,
laughs, and says:

"Oh, sorry. You're right... so what are you
doing?" etc.

You can COMPLETELY change the mood and tone of
a situation if you stand up, act like a man, and
refuse the invitation to be her free Wussy
Therapist Buddy.

But you really need to remember that a generous
helping of Cocky & Funny will make this work best.

If you listen to her problems and act like a
girlfriend, then that's what you're going to turn
into.

And thanks for the compliments... I get a lot
of feedback that this stuff helps in a lot of
different areas of life, and I know that my own
life has improved in many different ways as a
result.

Oh, and you're right about the fact that
investing in my DVD program will REALLY help your
success.

I guarantee that you'll be slapping yourself
and saying, "What the hell have I been waiting
for?"

If you've been dating average women, you'll
start meeting SUPER hot women.

2008-07-04T07:30:00.000-07:00

***QUESTION***

Mr. DeAngelo,

Your E-book has made my dating life a complete
Cinderella story. The reality that I live in now
would just be unimaginable to myself in the
mind set I held over a year ago. In high school,
I
was your typical acne scarred, pasty, out of
shape, dungeons and dragons-type shy loser. When I
started college, however, I became so determined
and focused on doing WHATEVER it takes to
completely turn my life around, that things
started to change faster than I could imagine. I
started working out, eating right, and I started
listening to Anthony Robbins and Brian Tracy audio
tapes to sort of build a base on which I could set
my goals in life and reprogram all the garbage and
limiting beliefs in my head. Invariably, I came
upon my dating life and decided to do whatever it
make myself as attractive as possible. at 19, I
had never previously kissed a girl or even had the
guts to ask one out.. was always the shy guy. But
I was determined to be the biggest ladies man on
campus, and with your help I've made this happen.

Of all the self-improvement type stuff I have
invested in, I must say that your e-book and
monthly series was definitely the best and most
rewarding investment I have ever made. And coming
from my position, this is a huge compliment. Some
people don't know what they are missing out on by
not investing in your program.

Everything in life all comes down to a decision.
If you think that you deserve great women, great
relationships, and a better quality of life
overall, then you owe it to yourself to try out
David's E-book, monthly series, and advanced
series. If it doesn't work after-all, he is giving
you the chance to send it back! Hrmm.. maybe I
should stop there.. i don't want my competition to
become too fierce.

And now comes a very important question which I
don't think has been addressed at all.. I think
I've come to the point where I've mastered my
"inner game".. My body language is hypnotic and
forceful, physically I'm in the best shape I could
possibly be in, my presence around other people is
very charismatic and domineering. My ease and
complete comfort ability in being myself around
women is just... I guess magnetic. I'm usually
the life of the party when in a group situation.
Of course, I'm not saying this to brag... All of
these things I have worked on, just like any other
skill.. on to the question: do you think there is
ever such a point where a person has to transcend
the cocky and funny approach? I'm beginning to
think that with all I've got going for me that if
I lay on C&F too heavily I just become
unapproachable to many women, and I've noticed now
more than ever that EXTREMELY beautiful women do
get very nervous around me especially with all the
other characteristics I've come to master.

If you're ever in Atlanta, drinks are on me
Dave.

-D from Atlanta

>>>MY COMMENTS:

First of all, I want to congratulate you from
taking your life from a place where you were 19
years old and had never kissed a girl... or even
asked a girl out... to where you are taking good
care of yourself, respecting your body, and doing
the things you need to do to get where you want to
go in life.

As you know, I get a lot of email from guys who
need advice about situations with women, and it
really amazes me how many of those guys haven't
taken the time to really get the BASICS handled...

I'm talking about the simple things like
keeping yourself healthy, addressing your
psychological issues... becoming an honest,
authentic person... and all that self-help-ish
stuff that most people think is kind of dorky...

This stuff is KEY to success with women.

There is a very interesting transformation that
takes place when a guy gets his life together, and
begins living the way he WANTS to live.

As your email communicates clearly, your new-
found confidence is very closely related to your
self-improvement program.

I hope this encourages others to do the same,
and to realize that the rewards are so amazing
that it's worth it.

Let's talk about your question...

You asked if there ever comes a time when you
should "transcend" the Cocky & Funny approach...
because women sometimes become nervous around you,
etc.

Let me answer that with a few random points
that come to mind, and then I'll tie it all
together with my general perspective...

1) You have cultivated a strong, confident,
dominant body language and communication that has
become what you might call "INNER COCKY."

As a result, you don't have to mix quite as
much "Cocky" in the actual verbal conversations
you're having.

If you project too much of the INNER COCKY,
while at the same time using overly-cocky WORDS as
well, you might come off as INSECURE or even TOO
ARROGANT.

Now I don't say things like this very often,
because most guys are so far from being "too
cocky" that there's almost NOTHING they could do
to project even ENOUGH cocky.

2) There is a particular situation that comes up
for guys who have a strong physical presence... or
guys who are naturally very handsome...

If these guys are too cocky with women, many
women get a first impression that is basically
"You must be a jerk."

Be careful. It might backfire on you.

3) If a woman is getting nervous around you, it
does NOT mean that you're doing something wrong.

Just think about how you used to feel when you
were in the presence of a super-hot woman.

Most guys become EXTREMELY nervous in these
types of situations... so much so that they're
actually IMMOBILIZED... and unable to act.

If a beautiful fashion model wrote in to me and
told me that guys get nervous around her all the
time... and then she asked if she should somehow
"tone down" how she looks so guys wouldn't become
nervous, I'd respond to her and say "Hell no. You
WANT guys to become nervous around you because it
separates the REAL men from the WUSSIES...".

In your case, these women are becoming nervous
because THEY don't know how to handle the
situation... which is not a problem at all for you
or for the ATTRACTION she's feeling.

Look, you are becoming a POWERFUL MAN.

You are beginning to realize and cultivate some
of the natural potential that you've always had
inside... you just didn't know how to get at it
before.

Success and power often scare people, because
with success and power comes responsibility.

You realize that you're not a victim in your
life anymore, and you begin to see how you can
take control of almost every aspect of your
life... and then you begin to see that people want
to FOLLOW your lead because you have this power...

It is magnetic, as you mentioned.

To answer your question directly, and connect
all of these things together, I think that you
need to realize that Cocky & Funny can be thought
of in a lot of ways...

It's a concept, an idea. It's a technique, with
specific "comebacks" and "lines" for different
funny situations. It's a tool to use for creating
Sexual Tension and Chemistry with women.

But, as far as I'm concerned, it's FUN... it's
something that's enjoyable for the man AND the
woman.

And for most guys, it's very natural (once you
become comfortable with it).

I mean, if you like to think in terms of things
being "transcended" in life, we could just say
that you're on the path to transcend everything,
and the faster you can transcend your need to be
with women, the better off you are...

...but, then again, that might be going a
little too far... lol.

As I read your letter, I thought to myself:

"He needs to learn the Advanced material"...

I think that you need to continue on your self-
improvement track... and I think that you really
should be dealing with a different issue.

Instead of focusing on one technique, I think
you need to be learning more about this particular
area of your life... and I think you need to be
focusing on figuring out how YOU want to do it.

My advice?

Get yourself a copy of my Advanced Dating
Techniques CD/DVD program.

One of the most important aspects of this
program is the "Inner Game" material included with
the program.

I spend several hours helping you understand
the psychology and dynamics of becoming the kind
of person you want to become... which then creates
a kind of FOUNDATION for the other things you're
learning from me.

It really is something that will change the way
you see things forever... and help you take your
success with women to the next level MUCH faster.

2008-06-27T07:29:00.000-07:00

***COMMENT***

Hey, I got your eBook a month or so ago. Great
stuff. I write a comment to you because of one of
your letters, the one from "M. Missouri",
specifically. He described starting his marriage
with the C&F and losing his touch. My advise: hit
the book, bud. My marriage was the typical story
of the wife with all the power. This last month,
the whole deal has turned on its head. We're
celebrating our 10th anniversary next year, and my
use of your eBook has moved the power from her to
at least shared (it'll be all mine soon enough).
The posture advise, and slowed deliberate,
confident movements, and, of course, the "like I
give a F" attitude all have brought this about.
Thanks David, and to the guy who's losing his
edge, take it from someone that had no edge and is
getting all of the control: you've let the book
sit unstudied for too long. If I can change over 8
years of bad history, you can reel your situation
back in.

P in Portland

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Great job, man.

Too many guys have this ideal or fantasy in
their minds of "being equals" with a woman, etc.

Ain't gonna happen.

Attractive woman aren't interested in an EQUAL.

They're NEVER attracted to guys who are EQUALS.

Attractive women want a guy who is a LEADER.
One who takes charge, keeps them on their toes, is
unpredictable, Cocky & Funny, etc.

Thanks for the letter.

***BREAKTHROUGH***

David, this might seem usual but I owe you $40.
See I purchased your ebook about a year ago but
asked for a refund because "it didn't work for
me". I realize now that it wasn't your material
rather my own issues that I had to deal with.
During that time frame I still read your
newsletters and gained more understanding of the
mindset of one who "Gets it". I'm still working on
that but as you said, some are quicker learners
than others. Another factor in this was the other
day when this hottie that I was chatting up was
saying how she would hold out longer if the guy
was "relationship material" than if she wanted a
booty call. (A great time for a quick C&F
comeback) A light clicked on and I remembered
where I'd read that before. The clincher was when
a buddy of mine let me listen to some of your
advanced material. All I can say is that I'm
getting my own copy as soon as I can. So where do
I send you your money?

Thanks, E.S. in San Diego.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

I admire you for coming back a year later and
admitting that you were the issue, not the
material.

SO YOU'RE THE GUY WHO ASKED FOR A REFUND, HUH!?

lol... hey, it's OK.

Yes, women do "hold out" longer if a guy is
"relationship material"... that is, if they are in
CONTROL of the situation they do.

And yes, at that point you should have shot
back:

"So that's how you think of me... as just a
BOOTY CALL? How romantic."

You know, sometimes I even find it hard to
believe that all this strange stuff is true about
women and dating.

But, it is...

***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***

Dave

What are you doing? Wait I'll answer that, YOU
are taking away ALL of the fun we get to have! Ok
I'll admit you're right about most, ok all, of it,
but there is still at least ONE thing that I know
you have never answered. If we put a guy into
your so called "Friends" category even YOU don't
know how to get him out of it!

JB -Canada

P.S. I recommend you stop selling your books and
"advanced tactics" before you do something
serious.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yeah, I'm really in danger now, huh?

And you're right... once a guy is in the
"friends" category it's not easy to get out.

In fact, I tell guys to just walk away and
forget about it, because it's such a pain to try
to change.

But, there's GREAT NEWS!

There are SO MANY women running around on this
planet that it DOESN'T MATTER.

Next!

The ironic part is that when you do take the
"Next!" attitude and stop treating a woman, who
only likes you as a friend, like she's special,
she'll often change her mind and start liking you.

Go figure.

***COMMENT***

First off, I am an avid reader of your material
and I employ it often. It works - well. I bought
your ebook about a year ago and it was worth every
penny. Anyway, enough ass-kissing. I have a
general comment about the whole gift-buying,
dinner-buying kissing a woman's ass concept. You
say that doing such things to win over a woman's
attention are foolish. I agree wholeheartedly.
However, I am in a relationship now with a woman
that I really like, and sometimes I want to buy
her things or take her out, etc. This isn't
because I feel I have to, but it is because I want
to treat her well. I don't feel that if I don't
do this, she will leave me. Therein lies the
difference between being foolish and needy about
it, and doing it by your own decision. It is the
INTENT behind what you do that is important. If
you do something for a woman because you feel you
have to or you will possibly lose her, she can
more than likely sense that, and will have
limitless amounts of power over you. If you do
something because you want to, then she will sense
the apparent confidence in you, and will not
necessarily have power over you because of it.
Besides, like you say, a woman should want you for
YOU - your personality - not what you can buy her
or where you can take her. NOTE: I agree that
gift-giving, etc. is a somewhat bad idea in the
beginning of a relationship for the same reasons
you don't like it. It makes you appear needy and
insecure, and no (emotionally stable) woman wants
that in a man.

P.S. It was your material that helped give me the
mentality to get with the girl I am dating
currently. Good work fella!

J from Philly

>>>MY COMMENTS:

YES!

You get it!

It's the intent behind what you're doing.

I have a little secret that I'm going to share
with you. But lean in close, so I can whisper. I
don't want anyone else to hear...

I actually have guy friends who are REALLY good
with women who take women to dinner, buy them
drinks, etc. when they first meet.

What, you say?

How can this be?

Well, the big difference is that these guys are
NOT doing this stuff to GET THE WOMAN'S APPROVAL.

And since EVERYTHING ELSE they're doing clearly
communicates the RIGHT things, they can actually
do whatever they want, and still not screw things
up.

In other words, if you don't understand how
ATTRACTION works, and you don't know how to
communicate with women in a way that makes them
feel it for YOU, then buying drinks and dinner,
and giving compliments, and all the other things
most guys do will only BACKFIRE.

On the other hand, once you totally understand
how and why women feel ATTRACTION, you can do
whatever you want.

And later on, when you find a girl that you
really like and you're enjoying a relationship, of
course it's nice to do nice things for her.

Just remember, be very careful.

It's easy to be lured back to the dark side...
and to try to get women to like you by paying for
things and taking them places... which it will
never do.

***QUESTION***

Hey Dave,

I just finished reading your latest newsletter and
I had a thought that I wanted to share. You talked
a lot about guys chasing women and showering them
with gifts to buy their love. Well, I have a
common sense point to make to any of your readers
that may be on the fence about buying your
materials.

Before I purchased your book, I had doubts because
I wasn't sure it would be worth the money. To put
it into perspective, I thought about all the girls
I dated in the past. Then I roughly added up all
the money I had spent on each for dinner, gifts,
etc. (Yes, I know, that was wussy behavior).
Well, after totaling up the money, I realized I
could have bought all your materials (book, CD and
DVD series) for myself and five of my close
friends and still had money left over (Yes, I
spent that much money on women in the past. I
know, that was bad). Point is, to any guy (or
girl) out there, take the money you're wasting
chasing some girl and buy Dave's book or CD/DVD
series. It's worth it.

Now to my question. I know this is getting long
but I gave you a plug so you owe me. Have you
taken any courses or read any books on
conversation skills? Can you recommend any books
on the subject and also on the subject of body
language? Thanks,

AG in PA

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You're right-on about one thing...

If most guys added up all the money they've
WASTED on women, they'd realize what a BAD
investment they've made (and what a great
investment my stuff is! I like your idea... I'm
going to tell every guy to get my materials for
them and all their friends from now on. Nice!)

The best books I've ever read on conversation
skills are COMEDY books. I like the book "Comedy
Writing Secrets" by Helitzer.

And as far as body language books go, I haven't
found any that I can recommend. The book "Body
Language" by Fast, has some interesting stuff in
it... but most of it is hard to really grasp.

One of the biggest problems I ran into when I
was first learning how to meet women was that
things didn't make sense... and things that
"should" work DIDN'T work.

When it comes to women and ATTRACTION the
normal rules don't apply anymore. This area of
life is VERY DIFFERENT from other areas, and when
you try to apply ideas and techniques from other
areas (like conversation skills), you'll find that
they often don't work AT ALL.

You can walk into a room full of 100 people,
and start walking around meeting them.

For 99 of them, walking over and saying, "Hi,
how do you know everyone here?" and "So, what do
you do?" will work just fine.

But when you find that ONE attractive woman in
the room that you'd like to meet, and you want to
start an interaction that leads to ATTRACTION, you
must do something TOTALLY different.

It's more than the words you say... it's a
total understanding of what that woman is looking
for on a deep, primal, subconscious level... and
then to BE that man.

***COMMENT***

Dave,

Sometimes I have to just stop in the middle of
your newsletters and take a break because the
stuff you deliver is so good that I feel a little
overwhelmed... killer stuff! I love the ebook and
CD collection. I will send some details later.

You really do more good in the lives you touch
then you know. I hope you can truly appreciate
that statement and all that it means. We should
all be so fortunate to have such a positive impact
on a single life... let alone the many that you
influence.

Best regards, E. Chicago, IL

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yes, someone give me a trophy... or a medal or
something.

I really am a wonderful guy, huh?

Trust me, if you had this much fun doing what
I'm doing, you'd do it, too...

***QUESTION***

Hi Dave

I've been receiving your free newsletter for a few
months now and just wanted to say that I've found
much of what you've written to be helpful,
insightful, and most of all funny! Like a lot of
other guys I've spent a LOT of time trying to
learn how to impress and have success with women,
and I like to think that I've come quite a long
way from the needy, desperate wussy-man I used to
be (and still am on occasion, admittedly).

My question involves one of the 'testing'
behaviors you described in a previous newsletter.
You said that one way women often test men is by
canceling plans at the last minute, or by flaking
out altogether with little or no notice. I've had
this happen to me numerous times and I always
assumed these girls were just being careless or
inconsiderate... or worse yet, ignoring me in the
hopes that I would "get the message" and walk
away, without them having to go thru the
awkwardness of outright rejecting me! It never
occurred to me that they might be doing it
intentionally, and then taking note of my response
in order to see if I passed some kind of test. Is
that really what's going on? And if so, how do I
pass the test? What is a woman looking for in
this type of situation?

Thanks, T

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, it is true that women use things like
this to test men... but it's ALSO true that women
do things like this because they want to AVOID
CONFRONTATION.

In other words, a woman will sometimes make
plans with a guy just to avoid saying "no" in the
moment.

But later, she'll flake or cancel because
"something came up"... when she never intended to
show up in the first place.

If women are flaking out on you a lot, it's
probably something that YOU'RE doing up front.

In any case, try this:

Next time you're talking to a woman on the
phone and making plans to get together for tea
say, "Let me ask you a quick question. Do you ever
flake out on things?"

She'll say, "Not usually" (or some other non-
committal thing, most likely).

Say, "Good, because it's one of those things
that I really can't deal with... people that can't
keep their word...and there are a lot of flaky
people in this world."

That might help.

And if she DOES flake at the last minute, don't
accept it.

If she calls and says, "Oh, something came
up..." just answer back, "You know, I was just
starting to think you were DIFFERENT from all the
flaky women I've met"...

Make it clear to women that it is NOT OK to
waste your time and they'll waste it less.

But, if you act nice and sweet and
accommodating... and you transmit the message that
it's OK to flake because you're a nice guy and
won't care, then it will happen to you all the
time.

***QUESTION***

hey dave,

i need an answer to a question that has confused
the hell out of me. well, i received a bunch of
red roses for valentines day from my girlfriend of
about 2 months now. i gave her 2 roses, a small
teddy bear thing and a short card with a bit of
c+f talk. i figured that i had made a bit of a
mistake by buying her this much, but when i gave
it all to her she looked so happy and told me that
SHE owed ME bigtime for what i had done. the rest
of the day i had no problems with kissing her or
anything else. my question is, why havent i been
seen as a wuss to her? i know that in most other
scenarios, buying this much stuff would have got
me nowhere.

by the way, your research and advice is all spot
on. its helped me to attract loads of girls,
including my current girlfriend. thanks and keep
up the great work mate.

S, AUSTRALIA

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yeah!

The reason she said that she "owes you big
time" is because of the WAY you did it.

When you incorporate the attitude into all of
your communication with women, it has a HUGE
impact.

The fact that you:

1) Did something thoughtful (the card, two
flowers, etc.)

2) AND you said Cocky & Funny things in the card

...clearly communicated that you were NOT doing
this because you wanted to kiss up to her and get
her approval.

One of the greatest things you can do is EVERY
time you do something nice for a girl and she
THANKS you for it say, "Yeah, you owe me" in a
sarcastic tone.

Then, later, get her to pay up.

Personally, I like massages.

There's something magical about always putting
a high value on yourself, your time, and your
attention. If you put a high value on it, women
will too.

...and a couple of final thoughts...

There are two KEY aspects of learning how to be
successful with women and dating:

1) The Inner Game

2) The Outer Game

The INNER GAME is all about learning how to
THINK and how to manage your thoughts and
emotions. It's also about understanding how and
why attractive women feel that amazing emotion
called ATTRACTION for some men and not for MOST
men.

The OUTER GAME is all of the techniques, what
to say and such.

Which is more important?

Well, they're BOTH important.

But what I notice is that most guys want to
learn the OUTER GAME first.

In other words, they want the pick up lines,
the fancy tricks, and other things.

I can remember when I first started learning
this stuff.

I had this idea in my mind that if I could
learn how to get women to give me their numbers
that I'd be the MAN.

Well, I learned that. I can get just about any
woman's phone number in just a few minutes.

But guess what?

Once I learned how to get women's phone
numbers, I ran into a much BIGGER issue... the
women usually flaked out on me, didn't show up,
etc.

And the ones that DID show up were difficult.

Nothing happened.

I realized that there had to be more.

And, as it turns out, there is. A LOT more, in
fact.

The REASON that the "Inner Game" is so
important is that attractive women don't judge you
on your "pick up lines".

And just because a woman gives you her phone
number or email address DOES NOT mean that she
FEELS anything inside (like ATTRACTION).

Women don't DECIDE to feel ATTRACTION for a
man.

ATTRACTION is something that happens on its
own, for its own reasons.

Attraction Isn't A Choice!

The way to cause women to feel ATTRACTION for
you is to UNDERSTAND how and why it works, and
then communicate in a way that makes it happen.

2008-06-20T07:28:00.000-07:00

***SUCCESS STORY***

i love your news letter and i have been reading it
for almost a year. i have been with the same girl
for nine months because of you dave! i used to the
same way about chics, buying them dinners, etc.
but once i started applying your techniques i met
the love of my life. i drive a piece of crap and i
am a broke college student. i played like i didnt
care when my girl and i first met before i know it
she's giving me lots of great sex, money, dvd
player, clothes,vetc. i was cocky and funny but
also threw in a little sweetness to catch her off
gaurd. Ladies get bored with the same old
dates,etc. I did outrAGEOUS THINGS IN AND OUT OF
THE BEDROOM AND NOW WE ARE PROBABLY GOING TO GET
MARRIED LATER ON WHEN I GET OUT OF COLLEGE!

THANKS DAVE! -C FROM TX

>>>MY COMMENTS:

What's this you say?

You have a great girl buying YOU things...
including clothes, and even DVD players?

Very powerful stuff.

You know, in your letter you mentioned throwing
in a "little sweetness" to "catch her off guard."

I would like to share a little profound
revelation:

It's OK to be sweet.

Yes, I know, sounds a little weird coming from
me.

But, it is OK to be sweet to women.

The problem is that most guys do it TOO MUCH,
and TOO SOON. And they come across as needy Wuss
Boys who are trying to use "niceness" to
manipulate.

When you meet a girl you really like and decide
that you want to take things to a "relationship"
level, it's actually great to be sweet.

Just don't do it before date #10! lol...

***QUESTION FROM A WOMAN***

Hi Dave,

I recently had a very serious conversation with my
boyfriend of two years about threesomes. I know
this isn't really a dating question, but I want to
get some input about this situation in
relationships in general and I thought you and
your newsletter would be a good place to start. I
am aware that as far as every guy in the world is
concerned a threesome is the best thing that could
happen in a relationship because he gets to have
twice as much fun as normal. But could most guys
actually go through with it? Could they really
have sex (or whatever else) with a girl while
being in a serious relationship with another? Does
this stuff even go through the mind of the average
male?

I am also aware that guys like two girl and one
guy threesomes and not the other way around. would
a guy think about the situation more if it were
their girlfriend having sex with another guy?
Also, how often do threesome ideas make it out of
the minds of men and into the bedroom?

hope you can answer some of my questions

es canada

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You're right about this not being a dating
question, but who cares... it's a question about
all men's favorite fantasy, so I'll allow it.

Now, what the heck are you doing asking, "Would
a guy think about the situation more if it were
their girlfriend having sex with another guy?"

Who cares! No guys do. They only want to know
what you'd look like kissing your best friend.

LOL!

And yes, your boyfriend could "have sex (or
whatever else)" with a girl while being in a
serious relationship with another.

Hey, you're the one who opened up the barn door
by having the "very serious conversation" with
him.

Let me know if it happens. We're all on the
edge of our seats here.

***QUESTION***

You know what David, you were right, and I feel
sick to my stomach right now. I met this woman,
went out a few times, nailed her the first night
and all that. I bought her some flowers for
Valentine's Day, mostly because she complained
like 3 times since I've known her (only a couple
weeks) that she never gets flowers on Valentine's
Day, so I wanted to surprise her.

So I took great care to sneak around her while she
wasn't looking, and plant them where she'd find
them. Well she did, and here's what she said, "Oh,
that's a really nice gesture, but next time just
leave them in my car okay? I don't want the other
students giving me a hard time or making faces at
me (this was at karate class)", In one quick
moment, my heart sank right to the floor, and I
felt WORSE about myself than before I bought her
the flowers! NEVER AGAIN am I wasting money on
this bullsh** holiday unless I've been with
someone for a year or more.

I can't believe I actually feel LESS close, and
like I have LESS power with this woman than I did
before I did something nice for her. You better
believe I won't make this mistake again. If you're
willing, lease share this story with your readers
so that at least the other guys can benefit from
my ignorance, and learn a lesson from it too. J

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Hey, you can't say I didn't warn you.

I'd offer a hug, but what YOU need is a to be
slapped up side the head for being a JACKASS!

You bought something for a woman because she
COMPLAINED?

Here, do this:

Go in the bathroom.

Find the mirror.

Take a big black sharpie pen, and write the
following on your forehead (backwards, so you can
read it):

"STOP BEING A DUMBASS!"

Try that.

If you're still with this girl in a YEAR, then
buy her some flowers.

But, will you leave them in her car this time?

Thanks for contributing... you've probably
saved many guys from a similar fate.

***QUESTION From A WOMAN***

David,

First of all, I would like to say that I really
enjoy reading your newsletters. A male friend of
mine started receiving them, and he now has me
reading them too. Now, thanks to you, we have both
adopted a "NO WUSS" policy..he's going to stop
being one, and I'm going to stop dating them. :)

I have a question that I would like your insight
on.. perhaps I should set the stage with a sample
online conversation... (After the usual initial
blah blah and silly comments on my part, he asked
and I sent him a pic)

him: yep, cute him: how tall are u

me: 5'10"

(insert cricket sound effects and silence)

me: helloooooooooo

him: later.. need to go work on a paper the end.

Me to the cricket: well, at least he didn't ask if
I play basketball.

My question is this.. are most men really
intimidated by taller women? If so, why? I have
actually dated a couple of people who were
obviously uncomfortable with my being taller than
they are. One even asked if I would mind not
wearing heels when we're out together, because it
made him feel weird. Needless to say, he got the
boot. (ha) If this is a silly concern, feel free
to hit "delete" or tell me to consult the pages of
Cosmo. I can take it! :) I'd just like to know if
there's anything I can do to make these guys feel
more at ease.

Thanks a lot!

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Yes, a lot of guys are intimidated by tall
women.

No, I'm not.

Yes, send me your number and picture.

By the way, I fit your "No Wussy" policy. I'm
your man.

***FOLLOW UP COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***

Hi Dave,

You are a Brat. I wanted to clarify something from
my letter which seemed to set you off. That part
about school/marraige/fairness: To be fair, if he
invested in my education, as my husband, he would
more likely get a return on that investment than
if he were just a boyfriend I was living with. It
is my opinion that people who live together have
all these committed ties, but one foot out the
door. Kinda like playing house. Personally, I
don't like doing things that half-a**ed, and would
prefer to eventually make a home--with the right
guy.

You are right on about him needing your material,
but if I sent him your e-book, it would be
insulting, don'tcha think? I do get bored if a guy
doesn't keep me on my toes, I know that about
myself. And, after awhile, it's a bore being the
only one pointing up to the sky.

What's the deal with you, anyway? Are you just
shopping? What happens to a guy who has all the
lines? Maybe this forum your path to personal
enlightenment. So, how's that going? SC from Sac

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Ohhhh, well thanks for clarifying.

I understand now.

If he supports you and pays for you to go to
school when you're MARRIED, then "he would more
likely get a return on that investment than if he
were a boyfriend I was living with"...

Powerful.

More likely.

Return on investment.

I feel ya.

That changes everything and makes it completely
fair.

Oh, and I didn't recommend that you buy him my
eBook. I recommended that you buy him my ADVANCED
MATERIAL. He needs serious help, dear.

And what's the deal with ME?

Am I "just shopping"?

"What happens to a guy who has all the lines?"

What do you mean "What happens?"

You make it sound like I should be going
through some empty feeling of superficial
accomplishment followed by a depressing
realization of unfulfillment... now that I know
the secrets of how to make women feel attracted to
me.

Sorry, can't help you there.

Knowing what makes women "tick" kicks ass!

***QUESTION***

Hi David,

this is a letter from one of your italian fans....
after having received your newsletter for several
months now, im really thinking to purchase your e-
book... i was specially impressed by the
"cocky&funny" attitude which attracts women in a
great way! and damn! this stuff works!!!

the interesting thing i want you to know is that i
have been a horrible wussy for several years! i
did almost everything on your wussy list! like
being nice to everyone....and so on...(;
fortunately (at the age of 20, now im 22) i had
the luck to meet a guy of 27 years who was very
successfull and experienced in approaching and
"getting fisical" with girls...he taught me a lot
about psicology of women and other very intresting
stuff you already should know...(; almost each
weekend we went out he got to know new girls,
specially american students here in rome and other
really good looking italian beautys...i analyzed
what he did, his behaviour and so on...

and now we ask ourselves...why was he so
successfull? and the answer is that he was almost
all the time cocky and funny! always making fun of
the girls! and he wasnt even goodlooking, just
medium...i began to imitate his behaviour and
since then i had an incredible success with girls
which surprised myself and all my friends because
i was dating one really hot girl after another....
so if you want to get interesting or "attractive"
you gotta be special, unique, full of selfesteem,
funny, unpredictable and all the other stuff you
teach us! thats the way how it works...sure there
are thousands of other things to do...i dont need
to tell you...

now i got a very important question for you, i
think that this should be a big help for almost
everyone receiving your newsletters or already
owning your e-book. my biggest problem is the
first contact...how to behave afterwards and how
to get fisical later is much easier in my
opinion...lets take this example, im in a pub with
a friend of mine, close to us are, lets say 3
goodlooking girls on a table and two of them seem
to be interested because they keep on looking to
us...they smile at us, look in our eyes for a few
seconds and play with their hair, showing you
their "delicious" neck , talk with a loud voice to
take your attention and so on ( some of the signs
women usually make)...my problem is now how to go
on! they seem to be interested but nobody is
outgoing enough to walk over to the other table to
start a conversation in order to establish a first
contact.. you always teach us that the content of
the conversation is not so important as the way
you say it right? but what can i tell them? (
fear of rejection i know) . how would you react or
behave? walking by, what would you tell them? ( i
think just asking them if they want to sit down
with us on our table is very wussy)... try to give
us concrete examples of the first "cocky&funny"
contact in a pub or other tipical places... that
would be great...

thanks for helping the wussyfied planet...(;

M.M. Rome, Italy

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, I'm glad to hear that you met a guy
who was successful with women, and learned from
him.

OF COURSE he was Cocky & Funny.

I learned most of my best ideas about how to
meet women from guys who were successful with
women, and I found that they all did basically the
SAME things... even though they didn't "realize"
that they were doing anything at all, for the most
part.

Meeting and hanging out with "naturals" is one
of the very best things you can do to learn how to
be more successful with women (the other is to
study the materials that I've put together at the
same time, so you can have the advantage of having
it all explained to you).

Now, to answer your question about approaching
women in "a pub."

I think the issue that you're PROBABLY dealing
with is REJECTION.

You're probably afraid to go start a
conversation because you don't want to be rejected
by women.

Once you can face this reality and start to
deal with it, then you'll start making more
progress.

My experience starting conversations with
groups of more than one woman in bars is that your
ENERGY makes a huge impact.

In other words, if you walk over and act
nervous and stilted, the women will get nervous
and act cold.

If you act like you're having a good time, you
think they look like some fun people to talk to,
and you start on that note, they'll be FAR more
likely to be friendly and open.

Now, I know a lot of guys who are GREAT at
meeting women in bars. Some of them use rather
interesting and complex techniques that range from
"pick up lines" all the way to magic and psychic
readings.

Try this:

Pick up your drink, walk over to the table,
think of the funniest moment of your life so you
have a smile on your face and say, "What, are you
girls shy or something?"

When they say, "NO, why?"

Answer, "Because I've been sitting at the next
table for at least a half hour and you haven't
come over to say hi to me!"

I have about 3 different friends who all use
variations of this opening... and it works great
(if you're having fun when you say it).

You need to get over your FEAR. Once you stop
caring what women think of you, then you'll make a
LOT more progress.

2008-06-13T07:26:00.000-07:00

Our topic this week is ATTRACTION.

Before you read further, I'd like you to take a
minute and think about what the word ATTRACTION
means to you.

By the way, I'm talking about the romantic
concept of ATTRACTION... not gravitational
attraction, etc.

If you can, WRITE DOWN exactly what you think
the word ATTRACTION means. The process of writing
down your thoughts helps you to organize them (I
recommend that you also keep a journal of your
experiences as you improve in this area of your
life). There are no right or wrong answers here,
so think about it for a few minutes...

ACTUALLY WRITE YOUR THOUGHTS DOWN.

...

OK, did you do that? Nice.

So what did you come up with?

A lot of guys seem to think that ATTRACTION is
when one person wants what another person has.

Some think of ATTRACTION as the result of being
good-looking or otherwise "attractive." In fact, I
think a LOT of people confuse ATTRACTION with
"attractive."

When I think of the concept of ATTRACTION, I
think of it primarily as an EMOTION. It seems to
me that it's more a COMBINATION of powerful
emotions that come together to form a very, very
special new SUPER-emotion.

However you think about it, there is a process
that happens that keeps men and women getting
together to have sex...

You are reading this right now, which is a
miracle.

Think of the thousands upon thousands of
generations of ancestors that you have had... and
think about the fact that NOT ONE OF THEM DIED A
VIRGIN.

And not one of them died in childhood.

And then think about the fact that you beat out
about five hundred MILLION other sperm-racers to
get to the egg first.

You are the result of, and represent, probably
the most amazing process I have ever heard of.

One of the parts of this process that
fascinates me is how each pair of your ancestors
decided to get together with THAT PARTICULAR
PERSON at THAT PARTICULAR TIME.

I know that some people will be upset that I'm
talking about this whole concept in such an
analytical, detached way... women in particular
seem to love the fantasy of two people being "soul
mates" and "knowing that your special someone is
out there" and "it just happening."

If you're one of those people, stop reading
now! lol...

After working on this area of my own personal
life for a few years, and trying all kinds of
techniques, it finally dawned on me that
ATTRACTION WAS BASICALLY EVERYTHING.

If a woman feels ATTRACTION for a man, then
nothing else really matters.

Looks, age, nationality, wealth, religion,
personal loss, peer pressure from friends and
family... none of it matters!

On the other hand, if a women DOESN'T feel
ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else matters in
that case either!

You can't "talk" a woman into feeling
ATTRACTION, any more than you can "talk" a person
who hasn't eaten for three days out of feeling
hungry.

I mean, if you really wanted to be fancy, you
could learn to be a hypnotist and talk them into
it that way...

But I'll tell you a little secret: Even THAT
isn't the best way to do things! (I actually know
several people who use this method of hypnotizing
women... and I haven't met one yet who could use
this technique alone to get women... there's
ALWAYS something else going on.)

What I'm trying to say is that one day it hit
me like a ton of bricks that ATTRACTION IS THE KEY
TO EVERYTHING WITH WOMEN!

If you don't know what it is or how to create
it, you'll wander around trying different
techniques... and probably never land on something
that works consistently.

And once I realized this, all kinds of things
that didn't make sense before INSTANTLY made sense
to me.

All of a sudden I realized why women dated
abusive jerks... ATTRACTION.

I realized why women dated men who were clearly
using them and cheating on them... ATTRACTION.

And I also saw the FLIP SIDE!

I realized why women pass up guys who are
honest, stable, attractive, and wonderful for
losers... ATTRACTION.

If she's NOT under the influence, then YOU'RE
gone. Nothing you do will matter if she doesn't
feel it.

If you doubt what I'm saying, ask the next 10
SUPER HOT women you see what they think of this.
Read this newsletter to them, and watch their
reactions. You'll see.

OK, now that you've heard a little bit more of
my personal perspective, I'd like you to look back
into your life and think about all those
situations with women that made no sense at all...

Think about the women that you treated
wonderfully that passed you up for the jerks...
and think about all the women "friends" you had...
the ones who told you about how mean and
inconsiderate their boyfriends were... while you
looked at them thinking "I would kill my own
mother for just one date with you."

Is it all making sense now?

THEY DIDN'T FEEL ATTRACTION FOR YOU!

YOU WERE BEING A "NICE GUY" AND PROBABLY A
WUSSY BOY, AND YOU HAD NO IDEA THAT IT WAS HAVING
THE EXACT OPPOSITE EFFECT OF WHAT YOU WANTED! AND
WORSE YET, THERE WASN'T A DAMN THING YOU COULD DO
ABOUT IT!

It's harsh to think about, but it's true. (By
the way, if you don't do something to learn how to
make women feel ATTRACTION, then most likely, this
is going to keep happening to you for the rest of
your life.)

I have to point out one more thing. As I
mentioned earlier, I think a lot of guys confuse
the idea of being "attractive" with the emotion
called ATTRACTION.

You can make a woman feel an INCREDIBLE
ATTRACTION, even though you're not what most
people would think of as "attractive." Of course,
you have to know how...

The point is that if you're not tall, handsome,
and dashing, you can LEARN how to make women feel
this wonderful emotion called ATTRACTION.

It's a skill. It's taken me YEARS to be able to
even talk about this stuff in simple terms like
this that makes sense, and it's taken me the same
time to figure out how a regular guy like you or I
can make women who we used to think of as "out of
our league," feel ATTRACTION for us.

How, you ask, can we do that?

Well, you've read about the technique called
"Cocky and Funny"... that's a part of it.

But there are several other pieces of the
puzzle, from voice tone and body language, to
specific ways to touch a woman to get her
physically turned on, and everything in between.
It's a system, and it all works together.

There are two KEY aspects of learning how to be
successful with women and dating:

1) The Inner Game

2) The Outer Game

The OUTER GAME is all of the techniques, what
to say and such.

Which is more important?

Well, they're BOTH important.

But what I notice is that most guys want to
learn the OUTER GAME first.

In other words, they want pick-up lines, fancy
tricks, and other things.

I can remember when I first started learning
this stuff.

I had this idea in my mind that if I could
learn how to get women to give me their numbers
that I'd be the MAN.

Well, I learned that I can get just about any
woman's phone number in a few minutes.

But guess what?

Once I learned how to get women's phone
numbers, I ran into a much BIGGER issue... the
women usually flaked out on me, didn't show up,
etc.

And the ones that DID show up were difficult.

Nothing happened.

I realized that there had to be more.

And, as it turns out, there is... A LOT more,
in fact.

The REASON that the "Inner Game" is so
important, is that attractive women don't judge
you on your "pick-up lines."

And just because a woman gives you her phone
number or email address DOES NOT mean that she
FEELS anything inside (like ATTRACTION).

Women don't DECIDE to feel ATTRACTION for a
man.

ATTRACTION is something that happens on its
own, for its own reasons.

Attraction Isn't A Choice!

The way to cause women to feel ATTRACTION for
you is to UNDERSTAND how and why it works, and
then communicate in a way that makes it happen.

2008-06-06T07:24:00.000-07:00

***DATING QUESTION FROM A READER***

Hi Dave,

Kind of an 'almost but not quite' success story
but compared to how I used to be it feels like a
miracle. Yes, in the past I was ultimate wussy boy
but then I got the ebook and began to change. (I'm
20 and glad I found this out now!) Always had
plenty of female friends but I was the therapist,
nothing more. And as I'm sure many guys who are
reading this know, it makes you feel like crap.
Anyway, by coincidence, I moved to another city
for work, just as I got the ebook. This meant that
I really had a fresh start. By another piece of
fortune I got very lucky: I met that rare woman
who has her act together FIRST TIME. Yeah, I
know. The first woman I meet EVER whilst trying
to be C+F, get my body language right, keep eye
contact and not be a wuss and she's the one who's
got her act together big style. I've always
picked things up really quickly (got to have some
good points when you only weigh 130lbs haha!) and
so just tried to stay cool for as long as I could,
mainly for the learning experience. And Dave,
thanks to reading your book day in and day out,
combined with the emails, I have done better than
I EVER thought I would. I still remember the
awesome feeling when she first started calling me
to do stuff (rather than the millions of other
guys who were always hanging around her, kissing
her ass.) Or how I would bust on her amongst our
group of friends and she would come right back at
me with an ever cockier and funnier comment and
all the guys would stare at me as if I was crazy
to say this stuff to her. They then proceeded to
say how unfair life must be because she is single
and to not take my comments to heart because she
is beautiful ...yuck, wussies!

So to the crunch. One night when this girl and I
were out pubbing and clubbing and battling each
other with our wits and building lots of tension
(so much fun) she opened up a bit and told me
that she had never met anyone like me and that I
was cool. All the cues that you said would happen
if you do the right things. Inside I was like
"WOW!" but I didn't show it and just told her that
her compliments and looking at me like a piece of
meat wasn't going to get her anywhere - she's a
great friend! By the end of the night she was
asking me the odds of us having sex within the
next few weeks. Now here's where I've got to hold
my hands up and risk your written wrath. In that
moment, this was the ONLY time I have ever been a
wuss with her. I'm a virgin and even though I
fancy her like mad, I know at present I couldn't
satisfy a woman like that (limiting belief I know,
but true!) I haven't got the skill yet and then I
realised that I had failed to plan ahead. Damn.
And I could hardly turn around and say "Hey, I'm a
virgin wuss who has never had sex! Teach me?"
Instead, as my answer I just smirked a little in a
poor attempt to look composed but I wasted a big
opportunity to amplify what was there; instead I
just dissipated all the tension by being a prick.
She appeared to let me off though and the next few
weeks were a C+F fun-fest again. I still played
it cool, no chasing, no clinging, no insecurity.
Then our mutual friends started telling me to ask
her for more. Even her best female friend said
that we should be together because we get on so
well. I remembered an email you sent saying that
if you meet someone you REALLY like then sometime
you're going to have to take the chance and tell
them. So when we were alone at another party a
couple of weeks later, I told her that we should
get together. Here's the messed up part: she said
that I was the best guy she'd ever met and that
she didn't want to enter a relationship with me
because every guy she has ever gone out with she's
ended up hurting. She said that she never wanted
to hurt me and wanted to know me forever. And
that if we stayed best friends forever, without
complications, we would have something great for
life and not a quick fling followed by never
talking again. She also said that she loved the
way that I stand up to her and don't kiss her ass
like most other guys. So, a lot of tears later
(from her), hugs, kisses and plenty of apologies
and I was left to wonder if my one error of sexual
wussiness had cost me in the worst possible way. I
believe this to be true because I know that if a
woman feels attraction for a man, then nothing
else matters. Her friendship logic wouldn't matter
if she "felt it" for me would it? I'm so pissed
off at myself for messing up (always been a
perfectionist, have to get everything right first
time!) However, she has surprised me in that she
hasn't run for the hills - she must've meant what
she said. Reason being because not only are we
still hanging out, but she sent me a Valentines
card (I sent her nothing) and just last week
invited me over to her place alone where she
cooked for me. I'm still playing it by your
teachings Dave but I'm at a complete loss. I like
her a hell of a lot and am really fighting the
wuss urge. I still bust on her, we still flirt, I
don't call her a s much as she calls me and I
haven't shared any feelings with her since that
night. I'm trying to stay cool man! Don't bitch
slap or berate me too hard, I've already done it
many times myself (and will continue to do so,
until I GET IT! I am not going to give this up!)
So after this damned long essay that says I've
gone on for too long (I've kept it to 2 paragraphs
though - albeit by cheating the rules of
grammar...) I have two questions: 1) Is there any
hope of turning this around? I know I should move
on but how long will it take me to find another
really exceptional woman that I get on so well
with? It seems like I'm so close but just haven't
quite got the skill to haul myself over the finish
line and it's very frustrating! 2) Where can I
get a good education on how to make love to a
woman? This is my final concern with women, I
believe. And when the time comes, should I admit
my lack of inexperience? (No amount of theory can
make up for lack of practice!)

Cheers Dave, without your teachings I would never,
ever have gotten this far.

M, United Kingdom.

P.S. She did your pocket a favor by turning me
down - it prompted me to buy the CD series. In
the long run, I guess she did me a favor too:
it's awesome so far. ***End of blatant plug***

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, first of all I want to CONGRATULATE you
on a great job with this girl.

You did all the right things, and you've
obviously paid attention to what you've learned. I
have a lot of respect for you for both DOING
SOMETHING to improve yourself, and for getting out
there and using the materials.

You should be congratulating yourself, not
beating yourself up.

I'M the one who gives the verbal beatings here,
not you, remember?

I think the real problem you're running into
here is that you've put too much importance on
this one situation, and by doing that you've
created "tunnel vision" for yourself. I'm sure
you've heard me talk about this a lot.

From now on, don't get so hung up on a
particular woman that you're not even
"technically" involved with. It's asking for
emotional trouble... and it's a pain.

So, let's talk about this particular
situation...

I'd like to share with you a thought to set
this up. It's a thought that might not go over so
well with a lot of people (especially women). But,
I believe it to be true, so I'm going to put it
out there.

Remember, this is a generalization, and not a
cold, hard fact... it's true MOST of the time. You
have to use your own judgment in each situation.

Now that the disclaimer is over, here's the
deal:

If you meet a woman (especially a sharp,
attractive woman who's intelligent), and you start
doing all of those wonderful things that spark and
amplify the ATTRACTION present in the situation,
you must KEEP MOVING FORWARD, or you'll lose
everything you've built.

What I'm trying to say is that if you don't
take things to a physical level quickly after
creating all of this sexual tension, it will
eventually go away, and you'll be left with just
"friend" material.

I know that you've never been with a woman
sexually, so I can understand why you hesitated.
But you must still remember what I said.

The rule of thumb is: If you're going to spark
and amplify attraction with a woman, you need to
continue on to the next level SOON... or you're
going to probably lose it.

When you just tease a woman, bust on her, get
her all wired up and excited about you... then
DON'T MOVE FORWARD PHYSICALLY, it's a let down.

Basically, the woman you're with has a first
impression of you that says "This guy is sexy and
attractive," but when you don't continue forward
on a physical level, she starts to think "Uh Oh,
he's either not interested in me 'in that way',
he's gay, or he's seeing someone else," etc.

If you want to be "friends" with a woman, it's
easy. Don't do anything.

If you don't make any "moves", don't try to
kiss her, and don't confidently lead in a physical
way, a woman will only think of you as a "friend".

Even if there is attraction based on
personality, it's going to disappear if you don't
cross over into the physical realm.

99% of the time, she's NOT going to be the one
to make the first moves... it's just not going to
happen. YOU have to do it.

The real keys here are:

1) Knowing WHAT to do to proceed in each situation

2) Knowing WHEN to proceed in each situation

3) Knowing HOW to proceed in each situation... in
a way that is smooth and natural... and that
doesn't get you "rejected"

You've got the benefit of having my eBook and
my Advanced Dating Techniques Program. I recommend
that you check out the bonus booklet that came
with "Double Your Dating" called "Sex Secrets,"
and use that material IMMEDIATELY.

Also, you'll learn a lot of great ideas in the
last few discs of my Advanced Series.

Let me cover a few basics here.

First of all, it's OK that you're a virgin.

It's no big deal. You're making it into
something bigger than it is by freaking out about
it.

I'll break the news to you:

SHE ONLY CARES HOW SHE FEELS, NOT WHAT YOUR
PAST SEXUAL EXPERIENCE IS.

If you can make her FEEL good, game over.

You're obviously a guy who can pay attention
and learn things. Spend a day at the bookstore,
and go to the "sexuality" section. Read for
awhile. You'll learn everything you need to know
to get past your "first time" just fine.

And, by the way, if you run into a problem...
like "performance anxiety" or nervousness or just
being uncomfortable naked around a woman... that's
OK, too. If you reach a point that starts to freak
you out too much, just lean back and stop for a
little while. One of the GREAT things about the
process of getting a woman turned on is that it's
much more powerful for her if you DO stop and
start... move two steps forward, and one step
back.

You don't need to say, "Hey, I realize that
we're both naked in bed here and we should be
making love, but I'm a virgin... and on top of
that, I can't get it up." No no nooooo....

Just kick back. If you have to, just call it a
night.

The KEY is that you have to at least PROGRESS
physically with her. Explained differently, you
don't necessarily have to go "all the way," but
you do have to get pretty far down the field...
and keep going a little farther each time... if
you want to keep the attraction building.

I have another secret to share with you...

Most guys suck in bed. And I don't mean that in
a good way. And no, I'm not talking from
experience.

I have known, interviewed, and received emails
from a lot of women. I know the deal. Most women
are not very happy about what happens in the
bedroom.

If you do just the things I've laid out for you
in the ebook and Advanced Series, and then you
totally blow it and are the worst lover the world
has ever known, she'll still have a GREAT
experience with you... because MOST of it will
have been fantastic for her.

Using the physical techniques... ways of
touching, ways of getting her physically turned on
and amplifying her arousal, that you've learned in
the materials, will get a woman so turned on that
just about ANY kind of sexual interaction will be
fine with her.

lol... and by the way, the next time a woman
looks at you and asks, "What do you think the odds
of us having sex within the next few weeks
are?"... you need to look her right in the eye and
say:

"Sex? Hell, I don't even know if you know how to
kiss."

...then lean over and kiss her.

When you're finished, pull away (you stop the
kiss before she does), look back at her, and say:

"Hmm, I'll have to get back to you about the sex
part."

2008-05-30T07:22:00.000-07:00

***QUESTION***

First of all, lets get things straight. I don't
like you. In fact, I hate you. Your success with
women disgusts me, and the way you have it down to
a science so well that you even make ME laugh
sometimes with your smartassed comments to the
lamers who write you vexes me. But it intrigues me
as well. Your stuff works. So I use it. Doesn't
mean I like you. Just means I like your "tools."

Anyway, the problem I'm having lately is I meet
and flirt with a lot of women using c&f, but when
it comes time for things to get a little physical,
they tell me they're waiting for marriage to do
all that! WtF?! Is there a way around this kind of
a "defense" that women use on me oh so often?
(Besides dumping their celibate asses.)

Name: D Location: Bufffalo, New York.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, this is just a guess, but maybe your
challenges with women stem from the dark cloud
around your SOUL!

...ah-hem.

Dude, I can tell that you're attempting to be
funny here, but it also sounds to me like you've
got some anger issues that might need professional
attention.

OK, the way to "get around" the "I'm waiting
for marriage" defense is to stop acting like a
bitter WUSSY.

If women consistently tell you, "I'm waiting
for marriage before I get physical," it can only
mean one of two things:

1) You're shopping for women at the convent.

2) You're CAUSING the resistance you're getting.

Most guys don't realize this, but THEY are the
ones who cause women to resist and make excuses.

Really.

And by the way, don't EVER again say that you
don't like me, but you like my TOOL. That's not
cool.

***QUESTION***

Dave- you da man! I just had a great experience
that I feel merits an email to you. There's a very
upscale restaurant/bar at which you can even buy
cigars from their humidor. There's a piano player
that plays jazzy tunes, and the place is pretty
expensive, quiet, with the aura of big money
patrons. (I love cigars and jazz, which is why I
wanted to go there so badly.)

So, as I've always wanted to go there, and I
finally mustered the courage to put on my best
suit and tie (complete with cufflinks), so I'd
look the part, despite the fact that I'm not rich
like the other patrons. The women there are
usually in groups, and they wreak of old money.

I sat alone and nursed a martini for about 30
minutes, while I scoped out the babes. I zeroed
in on a tall, stunningly gorgeous blond. (I have a
weakness for tall blonds.) I used the "Can I
borrow her for a minute?" trick, and it worked
like a charm! Then I teased her for having
friends who would just let her go off with a total
stranger. Then I mixed a lot of listening with a
bit of c/f once she joined me at my table.

She told me she was hungry, so I told her I was
getting hungry, too, and that I was about to
become nasty if I didn't get something to eat
soon. Then I said, "You're not very attractive,
but since I do happen to like that dress on you,
I'll be a sport and let you buy me dinner just
this once." I couldn't believe I said that!!!! I
was a little scared that she'd get pissed off and
leave.

She ended up buying me an expensive dinner!!! Plus
I got her phone number and email. I told her I do
a lot of traveling (which I don't), but that I'd
try to remember to call her next time I was in
town. She then asked me for my number and email!

I am still in shock. This girl looks like a
supermodel, plus she's rich! I really want to
call her or email her, but I'm deliberately
waiting, in order to give her the gift of missing
me. And though it's only been a day since it
happened, I still think she'll contact me first.
Should I wait for her to contact me or should I
contact her?

>>>MY COMMENTS:

lol... you're cracking me up over here.

While I don't recommend lying to women, I still
find your story pretty funny.

Thanks for the email, and for affirming that
these concepts we're talking about appeal
universally to women... rich and poor alike.

***SUCCESS STORY***

David,

Your book and newsletters are great and I TRULY
appreciate them, so I won't waste time telling you
about that. I had a success story tonight that I
just had to tell you about even though it's 4 in
the morning, I'm just that pumped. I just left a
fraternity party of mine, and there was this chick
there that has been hanging around the house and
with some of the other guys for a while (tall,
thin, blonde hair, bout an 8.5). She was at the
apartment we were partying at, and she sits down
next to me no the couch. I introduce her and have
a little small talk, and she makes a comment that
one of the guys told her that I am a photographer
(I work for a local newspaper full time) and that
she wanted me to take some pictures of her so that
she can get into modeling. I say, "So, you want
to be a parts model? You have some sexy toes?
(you're good Dave). She says, "What, you don't
think I'm hot?" I just kind of shrug that one
off. She acts shocked and I just go on.
Basically, all night I busted on her, looks and
everything, and she would act shocked at my
comments but I could tell she liked it (she's
5'11, so when I leave to go to the bathroom or
whatever I tell her, "You're like 6'5, so if
anybody takes my seat you put them in a choke
hold." Needless to say my seat never got taken
when I told her). I couldn't believe it Dave, I
would never have done this stuff before. She even
made a comment that I was such an a**hole and none
of the guys had ever treated her like this. I
would just smile and say "I know." She was eating
it up. I even told her at one point to go get ME
another beer. I was shocked when she said yes.
Later I gave her a ride back to her dorm, and on
the way home she was talking about how she needs
to quit hitting on guys, and told me about a game
she plays at parties with her friends where they
bet if they can get a guy to make out with them in
a certain amount of time. I tell her I wouldn't,
I'm not that easy. She's like, "Not even me?" And
I go on with the not easy part and she would at
least have to buy me dinner. Long story short I
get her number and she tells me to call her like 3
times. Right before she gets out of the car I
say, "Can I kiss you?" She says yes, and I say,
"Ok, I'll make sure to do that,"... She says oh
right and leans in to kiss ME. I couldn't believe
it Dave. I am on a high that no drug could ever
give, and I have you to thank for it. This is
probably too long, but I had to tell you.

Thanks a million. K. in Texas

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, what else is there to say?

There's really nothing like experiencing this
stuff in real life.

The first few times that you apply the material
and get women feeling ATTRACTION for you, are
amazing.

You wonder why the hell you didn't figure it
all out before.

Great job. You're the man. Thanks for the
story!

***COMMENT***

Hi Dave,

First off, not to sound like everyone else, but
your stuff rocks!!! With that being said I'd like
to offer a comment on J.M. from New Hampshire's
predicament.

J.M. said "What's the best way to deal with a girl
coming out and saying "oh, you're so
cute/funny/etc..."? Should I ignore it and keep
the c/f going? Should I address it in a cocky
way?"

A couple of my favorite lines to use:

She: Your so cute. Me: If you want cute buy a
puppy.

She: Your so funny. Me: Yeah, but looks aren't
everything.

It works great to down play her comments. Make
fun of yourself, but don't draw too much
attention. Act disinterested in her comments and
move on with the conversation. Let's her know you
really are comfortable in your skin and she should
really be closer to that skin!!

Hittin Heavy in Iowa, (with no sheep, LOL) S.W.

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Man, I don't even like sheep JOKES anymore.

You know, what I'm wondering is why they sell
those blow-up sheep DOLLS in the adult stores.
What's the deal? Are they for guys that don't even
have enough game to pick up a SHEEP?

OK, whatever.

These are great comebacks.

I personally don't use very much humor that
makes fun of myself early on... but your stuff is
great.

Thanks for the comments.

***QUESTION***

What's wrong with this letter. She works at Burger
King and I handed it to her. She didnt talk to me
anymore.

[The Letter]:

I like you!

You have an electrifying gracious attitude at
Burger King. You are leaving soon so lets chat on
the phone. Don't judge me by my lack of
conversation at the restaurant. I get a mental
block at times. Let me know if your interested.
OK.... Thank you

>>>MY COMMENTS:

What's wrong with this letter?

Well, other than the fact that it's the worst
thing I've ever seen, nothing really.

"You have an electrifying and gracious attitude
at Burger King..."?!

Say what?

Dude, why didn't you just say, "I am a stalker,
and every night when I go to sleep I can see you
flipping Whoppers?"

***QUESTION***

Hey David,

I love reading your newsletters every time you
mail them out, and I am going to buy your e-book
as soon as I get back from my vacation in New
York. While I'm out there though, I'd like to
know one thing. I like the newsletters you mail
out that deal with getting a girls number for the
first time. But I can't get myself to get started
even to that point. Yes, I know I'm really afraid
of rejection and that makes me make up excuses as
to why I won't come up to a girl.

I completely feel the way you say that I should
come up to a girl, talk to her for a minute, then
say something like "I have to get back to work
now," leave and then turn back and say "Hey, do
you have e-mail?" But my question is this: How do
I get a girls attention to begin with? In other
words, what do I say to her so that she will want
to talk to me for that minute you talk about? I
don't feel like saying "Excuse me, Hi... my name
is ..., do you work around here?" would be the
best solution for this. Do you?

Thanks for the newsletters because they are slowly
but surely making me grow some balls enough to get
up and go talk to a girl!

CAT, San Francisco, CA

>>>MY COMMENTS:

You know, it's funny...

You're asking a question that every guy in the
world wants to know the answer to.

It's a simple answer... and it's a DAMN complex
answer at the same time.

One of the KEYS to approaching women you don't
know is being able to do it as comfortably and
naturally as you call your mom.

If you get nervous, shaky, and freaked out the
woman will pick up on this... and it will make HER
nervous.

You can walk up to a woman and say, "Hi, I
don't have time to talk, but if you're single I'd
really like to talk to you sometime... do you have
email?"... and if you do it in a calm, comfortable
way, you can get a HIGH percentage of women to
give you their info right there on the spot with
no conversation needed.

On the other hand, if you're freaked out,
nervous, and acting like you're all jacked up on
speed while driving a getaway car, it doesn't
matter WHAT you say.

Experts estimate that approximately 7% of your
communication is the words you use, and 93% is
your voice tone and body language.

In other words, the WORDS aren't very important
at all.

So, how do you get the voice tone and body
language under control... and more importantly,
your EMOTIONS?

Well, this is a simple and complex problem as
well.

Personally, I have found that understanding
exactly how and why women feel sexual attraction
for men has DRAMATICALLY changed the way I
interact with women.

If you DON'T understand this important process,
you're just going to be "faking" it. If you DO
understand it, you're going to be COMMUNICATING
differently, and communicating with a different
PART of the woman.

Keep educating yourself. My eBook and Video/
audio programs will give you an amazing education
in this area, and can help transform your fear and
hesitation into ACTION.

***QUESTION***

David,

I've got to say that your emails have been a
great help and your CD series is unstoppable! In
both your emails and CD's you mention movie
characters to study and model yourself after.
Could write up a list of movies that you think are
worth watching for the Cocky & Funny attitude.

Thanks Dave.

B. D. Chicago

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Some of my favorite scenes:

- Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom... the
after-dinner scene when they're in the bedroom.

- Top Gun... when he follows her into the
bathroom.

- The newest James Bond flick... basically
everything.

- Gone With The Wind... the scene right after
Scarlet and Ashley are alone in that library type
room toward the beginning... when she throws the
vase and then Rhett Butler stands up from behind
the couch and starts chatting with her.

- Also, listen to how Howard Stern and David
Letterman mess with people CONSTANTLY. Great
stuff.

***QUESTION***

Dear David,

Amazing job with your e-book "Double your Dating",
I finally understand why most of the girls I've
been with left me after less than a month. I had
the natural humor, but it was mostly meant for
goofing off instead of being cocky.

My question is about kissing. From my dates, in
the second or third date, I would kiss the girl
using your tips (e.g. the hair) but I am not
really sure I am getting a good *job* into kissing
a girl. Its not like I can leave a comment box
after the date... do you have any suggestions on how
to make a good and memorable kiss? You did say
that a first kiss with a girl is pretty much like
first impressions ;)

- From one of your many loyal fans

>>>MY COMMENTS:

This is a great question.

I'm going to share a little secret with you.

It's a secret that I talk about all the time...
in my newsletters... my book... my seminars... my
Advanced Program.

The secret is ANTICIPATION.

Anticipation is such an important concept when
it comes to "getting physical" with a woman.

I believe that it's important to incorporate it
into every part of your interactions with a
woman... really.

Now, if you really don't know how to kiss a
woman, then I have a recommendation:

START SLOW, THEN MIRROR WHAT SHE DOES.

Here's how to mix this strategy with
ANTICIPATION.

Let's say that you decide it's time to kiss
her. You use the "Kiss Test", and she's enjoying
it... so you lean over to kiss her.

Just as you start to kiss her... when you first
feel your lips touching hers... stop right there.
Brush your lips back and forth on hers a little
bit... then pull away without actually kissing
her.

Then smile at her.

You'll probably be sitting there thinking, "Why
the hell didn't I just kiss her?"

She'll probably be sitting there tingling all
over, and feeling like she wants to jump on you.

Next, lean back. Talk a little more.

A few minutes later, touch her hair again.

Then lean over to kiss her again. This time, go
VERY slowly... gently press your lips against
hers. Hold them there for a moment, and feel how
she responds.

If she kisses you the same way, then just stop,
lean back, and relax again for a few minutes.

The next time you kiss her, open your mouth
just a little bit, and see if she does the same.

Do this a couple of times.

At some point, she will probably start
"escalating" the kisses, because the anticipation
is just too much for her.

At this point, stop her. Push her away, and
smile.

MORE ANTICIPATION.

Just keep mirroring how she's kissing you as
things get more and more intense. This is a great
way to "learn" how to kiss... and she'll enjoy it,
because you'll be doing exactly what she likes!

By the way, if you'd like to learn how to both
SPARK and BUILD that magical thing that women call
"chemistry" and "sexual tension," then it's
important that you learn and MASTER the technique
that I call "Cocky Comedy."

Before you can get into building PHYSICAL
anticipation and taking things to a PHYSICAL
level, you must trigger ATTRACTION inside of
her...

And Cocky Comedy is the one single technique
that accomplishes this for you... and the best
part is that you can do it with your COMMUNICATION
ALONE.

No good looks, no buying dinners, and no giving
lavish gifts required (in fact, these things can
actually work against you).

And what's the best way to learn Cocky Comedy?

It's simple: Get yourself a copy of my new
Cocky Comedy CD/DVD program.

Listen as I and my guest teachers take you
"behind the scenes"... and teach you the magic
technique that guys who are NATURALLY good with
women use to create ATTRACTION.

It took me a massive amount of time and effort
to even DISCOVER this technique... and then years
to MASTER it...

And you can learn dozens and dozens of sure-
fire lines and comebacks with just a few hours of
fun listening.

In fact, check out this email that I got from a
guy who just got this program:

"Dear Double D,

Do you remember when you said that some guys "get
it" in a week and others in a year or more? Well I
was one of the "Year or More". Well two years,
three months, and 24 hours later I finally "get
it" and it happened right when I was about to give
up entirely.

Well let me give a little background on me. I was
that 1 in every 3 guys that are below average
looking, suffer from morbid obesity, 21,
generosity is a good thing, mom's advice for
picking up women is the best, and always have a
date every year or so. Now I AM that 1 in every
three guys that are below average looking, 21, and
suffer from morbid obesity. I did exactly what you
told me not to do. I just jumped in head first
into the Advanced and Mastery programs, negating
all the signs saying I should go back to the
beginning. I thought to myself "Hey I can just use
the pick up lines and some of this other stuff and
I'll be instantly successful with women." That
didn't work and I found my face getting very red
and my shirt getting very wet from women's
rejections.

I got your Cocky Comedy program a few days ago. I
listened it back to back probably eleven times and
I still wasn't getting it. Well, last Friday I
tried again using the new lines I had learned but
I still found my shirt wet. I got very upset. Now
I am not talking hissy fit upset, I am talking
"it's go time" upset. I decided to go and blow off
some steam. I had heard that a new coffee shop was
opening up. I thought why not can't hurt anything
more. No more than about two minutes after me
entering the shop, a feisty definite 10 redhead
walks in. I got up to try. I got behind her in
line and looked at her thinking what could I say.
She caught me looking and said "It's not polite to
stare, you know." I snapped back with "Then why
are you staring." "I am not." she said. I then
mocked it, gave her the name Kid, then she was
putty in my hand. I asked for email and then said
"You know you're probably just going to stare at
my picture the entire time online. Why don't you
give me you number as well?" She wrote it down and
slammed the piece of paper in my hand. "There,
happy. Now be here at 7:00 next week." I said "No
you be at Starbucks at 7:30 next week. And I'll
think about joining you." "Think about it..?" she
said in a kind of cooing voice. I said dominantly
"Think about it!"

I never in all my life felt like that. And I could
never have done this without your help thanks
Double D. I'll let you know how everything works
out.

Thanks in MS, DA"

>>>MY COMMENTS:

...lol, I guess that will teach him to start
from the beginning and learn the basics first.

2008-05-23T07:19:00.000-07:00

I have a lot of guys write me to say, "I know
this girl who's beautiful and smart and
attractive. She and I are great friends, we have
everything in common, and we get along
perfectly... but she says that she's just not
attracted to me..."

Have you ever noticed that:

1) The most attractive and interesting women seem
to be attracted to men who don't treat them very
well?

2) That the "nicer" you are to a woman the more
she often seems to act like "just a friend" to
you?

What's going on here? Didn't mom say to be
"nice" to girls?

Here's the deal: Women aren't usually
romantically attracted to "nice" guys. Women are
attracted to men who are funny, confident, and
mysterious. Good looks don't hurt, but if you're
not 6'4" tall and model-handsome, then you have to
learn how to attract women with your personality.

And being "nice" isn't going to do it for you.

A while back, I mentioned an interesting book
that was written about the band "Motley Crue."
Remember those guys?

Well, the book is called "The Dirt: Confessions
of the Worlds Most Notorious Rock Band." As I read
through that book, I realized that these guys have
dated more of the world's most attractive women
than anyone (except maybe Hugh Hefner).

In case you didn't know, the guys in Motley
Crue are not very "nice." They're famous for
taking every drug known to man, beating their
women, fighting, and having a lot of people die
around them.

Now, the first thing most guys say is, "Yeah,
but they're rich and famous..."

And this is true, they are rich and famous.
But, and it's a BIG ONE... all of the women that
they have dated, married, and beaten up are ALSO
RICH AND FAMOUS TOO!

These are supermodels and playmates of the year
and such. These women can date whoever they want.
Tommy Lee was MARRIED to both Heather Locklear AND
Pamela Anderson... remember?

These women didn't need Tommy Lee for his money
or his fame... they're dating these guys for some
OTHER REASON!

Are you with me on this?

So what's going on here? And more importantly,
how can you use this information to be more
successful with women and dating?

First of all, don't go out and start taking
drugs and beating up your dates. I mean, I know
that an occasional woman will drive a man to
drink, but I don't recommend going "Motley Crue"
on a girl... lol.

The first chapter of my book "Double Your
Dating" is called "Women Don't Make Sense." Here's
what I mean...

I believe:

1) Women make decisions very, very quickly about
whether a man is going to be "just a friend" or if
he has romantic potential, and once her decision
is made, it's probably going to stay made.

2) These decisions are made "subconsciously,"
meaning that women make all of them quickly and at
a "gut level."

3) If you know how, you make her feel attraction
feelings rather than "friend" feelings.

4) The way to do it is to stop acting "nice" and
start acting, well... something else... and I
don't mean "not nice."

So what DOES attract women? And how do you do
it exactly?

Good questions...

At the beginning, I mentioned three qualities:
Funny, Confident, and Mysterious.

Before I talk about each, I first have to
remind you that WOMEN DON'T USUALLY MAKE SENSE.
Remember that.

Here's a good metaphor: Remember when you
learned to drive? It all made sense... turn the
wheel left and go left, turn it right and go
right...

But do you remember when you learned to back
up? Backing up was a whole new game. Everything
that used to work now works in a different way. At
first you feel disoriented. Turn the wheel left
and go right... and you have to learn how to
maneuver with the back wheels staying straight
while the front wheels turn... all with your head
turned around.

For most people, this takes some time and
practice. But once you "get it" then you can do it
anytime you want.

Well, women are very similar. At first it's
very confusing. You have to try things that don't
seem to make sense. But once you get the hang of
it, then you see how it works and can make it
work... just like backing up a car.

As much as many women would hate to admit it,
there's something very attractive about a man who
is just a little more confident than he should be.
And if you combine this with the right amount of
humor, you have a magic combination that will
charm almost any woman.

Here are a few ways to use this idea:

1) When you first meet a woman, tease her about
something. It doesn't matter what it is, as long
as you do it early on. For instance, you might
say: "So what's with the big purse? Are you
carrying a gun in there?" or maybe "Those are some
pretty tall shoes, what are you like 4' tall
without them?" If you tease a woman, it shows that
you're not intimidated by her, and that you have a
fun sense of humor. KEY: Make sure you say
something FUNNY. If you don't know how to be
funny, get a book on it. The test: If she's not
laughing, then it wasn't funny!

2) Look around at other things and seem kind of
pre-occupied when you first start talking to her.
Make your funny remarks with a carefree, detached
tone. You want to sound like you're talking to
your best friend. Attractive women are approached
all the time. It's not attractive to a woman when
you look like you've just met Madonna. This "just
a little too confident" attitude is very
attractive to women... especially when it's
combined with humor.

3) Don't answer her questions directly. Women love
to ask questions like: "What do you do?" and
"Where do you live?" and "Tell me about your
family." Answer with funny answers, and don't give
her what she wants. Most guys say, "Oh, I'm an
engineer" or "I'm a stock broker." BORING,BORING.
If she asks what you do... say, "Oh, funny you
should ask. I'm a Calvin Klein Underwear Model...
What do you do?..." (This is especially funny if
it's OBVIOUS that you are NOT a model) Do you get
it? Keep it up and keep her laughing.

It's important to remember that I'm not telling
you to be mean, or to be a jerk to women. I'm
telling you to start being confident, funny, and
mysterious.

2008-05-16T07:17:00.000-07:00

Hey Dave!

I am an avid reader of your newsletters and
mailbags ...this stuff literally blew me away. I
also have your e-book. I had never seen or read
any other "dating expert" use the word
"attraction"...period! They never mention it in
anything they write yet it is the MOST IMPORTANT
thing that determines your success with women. Out
of literally dozens of articles and e-books from
so-called "dating pros", the word "attraction"
just doesn't ever come up! I even read in one e-
book that to attract women you need to get a
golden tan. I was like: "What the hell? That's not
the key to attracting women you dummy! Besides,
what if you cant tan?!!"

When attraction is imminent, women try to be with
you and chase you. If attraction is not there,
they make up excuses and try to avoid you. This is
so simple... yet so easy to understand but many
guys who haven't read your eBook miss this vital
point and thus waste time on women that aren't
interested! Attraction is EVERYTHING! That is why
anyone reading this that hasn't bought your e-book
or your Advanced CD series should do it
IMMEDIATELY! It's definitely worth the investment.
In fact it will pay you back over the rest of your
life because you will be so much better with
women! Don't pay hundreds of dollars or waste time
on the other material that's out there...buy
Dave's materials! Ok, Dave, I'm sure your head has
grown 10 times as big now and since I'm not
getting paid for making you a few extra sales, so
I'll quit now! But really, buy the stuff...it's
excellent! It's things in there you have never
heard of before that is so critical to your
failure or success with women!

Anyhow, that was my insight on how great your
material is...now I have a question about
something I read in your mailbag previously that
really stood out to me. It was the one about the
guy who said "Can I kiss you" to a woman that was
getting out of the car as he dropped her off. I
thought saying "Can I kiss you?" was wussified
behavior? That didn't sound like something you can
say without looking like a needy dork but the guy
said it worked for him and he got the kiss anyhow.
Did I miss something here? Explain that Dave.
Also, have you learned of any other "Kiss Tests"
like the one on your site?

GT from Nashville

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Well, thanks for the shameless advertisement
for my ebook and Advanced Series. I'm glad you're
having success with the material.

I'd like to comment on your observation that
there's no one teaching guys about ATTRACTION...

I noticed this exact same thing when I was
first learning about how to meet and date women.

It took me probably two years of trying things
before I finally realized that there was something
else going on with women that NO ONE was talking
about. Finally, I realized that this magic
something was an EMOTION.

Women don't meet men and say to themselves
"Well, he's my physical type, he has a good job,
he dresses himself pretty well, and he looks like
he's good in bed... I think I'll TURN ON MY
ATTRACTION for him..."

No way.

There's something that happens to a woman,
usually in an INSTANT, that sparks the "Chemistry"
or "Sexual Tension" or "Attraction." And then, if
the man knows how to build that tension and
AMPLIFY the EMOTION called ATTRACTION that the
woman is feeling, there's a very good chance that
they will get together.

If, on the other hand, a man does NOT
understand this simple fact, and more importantly,
how ATTRACTION works, then no magic technique in
the world will work consistently for him.

I've learned that ATTRACTION is EVERYTHING.

SO WHY HASN'T ANYONE FIGURED THIS OUT?

Well, I have a theory about that, too.

In a nutshell, I think that because men are
sexually attracted primarily to LOOKS, they just
ASSUME that women must be the same way. We guys
just simply never take the time and energy to
figure out what women are actually attracted to...
so we act like failures with women... and they
treat us like failures.

And many of the guys I DO know who are good
with women don't realize WHY what they do works so
well. They just do what they do, and women are
attracted to them. Most of them haven't taken the
time to figure out that what they're doing is
triggering the powerful emotion called ATTRACTION
inside of women.

To finish my thought on this, you're right.

No one talks about ATTRACTION... and that's a
problem, because if you don't "get" attraction,
then it's going to be hard to "get" women to be
interested in you.

Now, you asked a question at the end of your
email.

You wanted to know if the guy who asked, "Can I
kiss you?" was being a Wuss.

OK, I'm about to share a VERY, VERY powerful
tool to use when you're interacting with women...

*** Before I share this secret, I want to mention
that if you want to get a SERIOUS education on the
topic of attraction, check out my eBook
"Attraction Isn't A Choice." You can download it
right here:

http://www.DatingTechniques.com/AttractionBook

When I tell you what it is, you're probably
going to say, "That doesn't sound important"...
but IT IS.

Trust me on this one.

When you asked your question in the way that
you asked it, you indicated to me that you MISSED
WHAT WAS GOING ON. You missed the point of the
question.

One of the things I tell guys to do is TEASE
women.

Teasing can mean one of a couple of things.

Teasing can mean starting to kiss her, then
stopping, starting, then stopping... over and over
again. In this context it's usually considered a
good, pleasurable thing.

For instance, if you kiss a woman gently, then
pull away... then do it again... then again... and
you can tell that she wants more, but you're not
giving it to her, you're teasing her.

Also, teasing can mean "poking fun".

An example would be saying, "Wow, those are
some tall shoes. What, are you like three feet
tall without them?"

Think of how you used to tease girls on the
school playground when you were a kid.

That's a different kind of teasing.

Now, BOTH kinds of teasing are great to use
with women who you have a romantic interest in...

Let's talk about the "Can I kiss you?" example
for a minute.

As you might remember, it went something like
this:

He waited for a moment when it was clear to him
that it would be OK to kiss her. She wanted it.
Then he said...

Him: "Can I kiss you?" Her: "Yes" Him: "OK, I'll
make sure to do that."

At this point, she said "Right"... and leaned in
to kiss HIM!

What happened here?

What happened was a little bit of GENIUS.
That's what happened.

He was TEASING HER. He was doing something
that, at first glance was kind of Wuss/Nice Guy
thing to do. But remember, he had so much momentum
built up, that this little "slip" was perceived by
her as OK. In fact, he had so much momentum and
ATTRACTION built up that she WANTED IT.

He says, "Can I kiss you?", she says, "Yes",
then he TEASES her by saying, "OK, I'll make sure
to do that."

Yeah!

In that moment, she realizes that his Wuss
behavior was actually a JOKE, and that he was
actually MESSING with her and teasing her.

And at that point she leaned over and kissed
HIM.

Now, let me share something that I made up that
I have used with women on many occasions...

Let's say I'm out and I meet a girl walking
down the street, and I get her email and phone
number.

We send a couple of emails back and forth, then
we get on the phone.

Because I'm always teasing and busting balls, I
KNOW that she's enjoying it and interested in
me... so in that first phone conversation I'll
say:

Me: "You know, I was telling my mom about you
today" Her: "Really?" Me:
"NO, you dork! Why would I tell my MOM about you?
Get over yourself!"

Are you with me?

Remember, I'm being charming, Cocky, Funny, and
unpredictable from the start... and I KNOW that
she's enjoying it. The tension is building, even
as we have our first phone conversation.

So I then say something that just plain doesn't
fit ("I was telling my mom about you today?"). She
says, "Really?" in a half flattered/half surprised
way, wondering what's going on.

I then pause to build up the suspense.

As the pause is happening, and she's starting
to think to herself, "Uh oh, he really likes me",
I drop the "No, you dork! Why would I tell my MOM
about you? Get over yourself!" line.

It's funny, confusing, and a HUGE tease.

It usually gets a huge laugh... and it
communicates that I not only "get" what's going
on, but I'm so confident that I'll tease her about
it.

Now, this is what you might call an "advanced"
move.

If you don't know how to tell if a woman is
attracted to you, how to spark attraction, how to
amplify the attraction, and how to move from one
step to the next, you're just going to sound like
a dumb ass when you say something like this...
because you'll say it at the wrong time, or you'll
say it to a woman who isn't very interested in
you... which will make things WORSE instead of
better.

I hope you hear what I'm saying.

One of the GREATEST things you can learn is how
to use SUBTLE humor with women to IMPLY what
you're thinking without actually SAYING it
directly.

As I say in my ebook, "Double Your Dating" and
in my Advanced CD/DVD Program, men take things
literally and women are always interpreting...
they're always trying to figure out what
everything you're saying and doing "REALLY MEANS".

Communicating with women on a "sexual" level is
a skill that you must learn and develop... and
thankfully ANY man can learn how.

Once you learn this new "language," you'll
start to experience women in a whole new way.
You'll be sending and receiving signals in a
language that you never even knew about.

And it's FUN!

And the best part is that WOMEN WILL REALLY
APPRECIATE and ENJOY the fact that you actually
know how to communicate with them.

2008-05-09T07:16:00.001-07:00

By the simple fact that you are reading this right
now, I know one thing is for sure:

You want to improve your success with women.

And here’s one thing YOU know for sure:

There is a BIG difference between WANTING to have
more success with women... and ACTUALLY MAKING IT
HAPPEN.

I can remember when I reached the point in my
life where I decided that I needed to get this part
of my life called “meeting women” handled.

I won’t bore you with the details, but I was
going through a time where I had just moved to a
new city... I was single... and I had NO IDEA how
to meet women or get dates. One night I was
talking to one of my best friends and I said, “I
am going to figure this out for myself, no matter
what it takes”.

Well, it wasn’t exactly easy to “figure it out”.
I spent the next few years reading a lot of books,
listening to “motivational tapes”, going to seminars,
and generally trying out a lot of whacky ideas that
I was learning.

Let me say that again, in a different way:

I spent several YEARS reading and studying every
piece of material on dating I could get my hands on.
Maybe you can relate.

Here’s something you might also be able to
relate to:

After all of those years of study, I was still
far FAR away from having the success with women
that I wanted.

In fact, I wasn’t very much further along the
path than when I STARTED.

But then... something INCREDIBLE happened...
almost by accident.

Within just a few short months, I was able to
“crack the code”... and began meeting more women
and getting more dates than ever before... with
HIGHER-QUALITY women than I had ever met in my
entire life.

Looking back, the reason for my breakthrough
is painfully obvious... although I couldn't see
it at the time.

>>> The real “break” came when I started meeting
and hanging out with guys that were ALREADY GOOD
WITH WOMEN.

I’m talking about guys who were either
“naturals”, or had taken years of their time to
figure it all out on their own.

To make a long story short, almost as soon as
I began actively seeking these guys out and
making friends with them, I started making RAPID
progress.

My “old” friends couldn’t believe my success,
and at first, neither could I.

There is just something about learning directly
from someone who has “been there” that is
INCOMPARABLE.

I don’t care if you’re trying to learn how to
make money, get in better shape, or become more
successful with women.

There is simply no better way to GUARANTEE
your success than by learning DIRECTLY from
someone who has already mastered the skill you
want to learn. No amount of stumbling around on
your own can substitute.

The Challenge Of Learning From The Best

Unfortunately, when you set out to learn from
guys who are already good with women, you tend to
run into 3 big problems:

1. Guys who are great with women are very RARE

2. Guys who are great with women are very BUSY
with all of the women in their lives

3. Guys who are great with women generally don’t
want to spend their time teaching a guy they don’t
know how to do something that to them is as simple
as using a knife and fork... at least not for free.

But now, fortunately... there is a simple
solution...

One of the biggest benefits I’ve enjoyed of
getting into the “business” of helping guys to become
more successful with women has been that I now get to
personally meet these rare men who are great with
women on almost a DAILY BASIS.

I really feel like the little kid who gets to
go in the dugout at the All-Star game. I now get
to meet all of my “heroes” and learn their
secrets... and I can't even begin to tell you how
valuable it’s been.

Several years ago, I began setting up
interviews with the BEST of these experts, and
recording them to make them available to guys who
were serious about getting results with women FAST.

I’m talking guys who charge THOUSANDS of dollars
for their time, and people pay it because they get
RESULTS.

These guys are real-life experts who know the secret
psychology of attraction inside and out...

These guys have developed and field tested their
methods and have worked out ALL of the kinks... so
that YOU are receiving the absolute BEST advice
possible.

They answer the questions that are absolutely
CRITICAL to your success... questions like:

How do you build attraction in a woman QUICKLY?

How do you keep a woman’s attention focused on
you?

How do you approach and talk to a woman without
rejection?

What are the tips and secrets to successfully
meeting Women online?

How can you get a woman’s number or email address
FAST?

How can you take things to a physical level, and NOT
get shot down?

What do you do when a woman doesn’t return your
phone call... or flakes on a date?

... and many, many more questions on EVERY ASPECT
of meeting women and creating attraction.